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bipolar irritability (argh!)


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I'm having some manicky symptoms, especially intense irritability. When I'm like this, I could start a fight with a wall. I am an asshole, completely lacking in empathy and patience. My poor fiancee tonight was crying on the phone because she's lonely (we're temporarily physically separated due to school duties) and all I could think was... pull yourself together and stop crying already! Clearly what I'm thinking and doing is more important.

Usually when I'm like this, I isolate as much as possible so I don't actually start arguments. But I'm in school and I'm in a relationship and I can only disappear so much.

Any tips for handling bipolar irritability? I'll take anything I can get right now except meditation. Sorry, just not my thing.

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I wish I had some advice for you, but I can tell you that you are not alone. I get the exact same symptoms, although I'm not yet on a mood stabilizer, which I'm hoping will help (waiting for insurance approval on Latuda). It's good to know I'm not the only one who experiences mania/hypomania in this way. Also Lana <3

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8 hours ago, aura said:

I'm having some manicky symptoms, especially intense irritability. When I'm like this, I could start a fight with a wall. I am an asshole, completely lacking in empathy and patience. My poor fiancee tonight was crying on the phone because she's lonely (we're temporarily physically separated due to school duties) and all I could think was... pull yourself together and stop crying already! Clearly what I'm thinking and doing is more important.

Usually when I'm like this, I isolate as much as possible so I don't actually start arguments. But I'm in school and I'm in a relationship and I can only disappear so much.

Any tips for handling bipolar irritability? I'll take anything I can get right now except meditation. Sorry, just not my thing.

I could have written what you wrote about the irritability.  That describes me to a T.  I'm sorry you have to be around people sometimes when feeling like this.

What I do to keep myself together, so nothing gets said that I'd regret later, is to be alone.  No people around.  I turn the phone off/do whatever I have to do so I don't  here any part of the ring of the phone because that will really set me off more than people will.  Also, no noise.  Maybe quiet TV or quiet music, or if hot a fan or A/C, but otherwise I do my best to keep things quiet. 

So people, the phone, and noise will all set me off. 

I hope this goes away soon ... I know what it is like and hate it.

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I also wish I could give any help, but I do not know what to say. I do sometimes get pretty intense irritability and anger at times when mixed, commonly combined with racing negative thoughts. These thoughts almost always pertain to interpersonal conflict involving family members. They are generally far more intense and negative than what I get when hypomanic or manic, which mostly takes the form of impatience.

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Exercise is supposed to help. I have the problem with irritability too, and it sneaks up on me. I try to go take a walk and I let everyone around me know I am feeling irritable. It doesn't always help, but I find people to be a bit more understanding when I tell them up front. Anxiolytics are extremely useful, as they mitigate things for me.

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Seroquel is mellowing me out, but I can get intensely, unexpectedly irritable when mixed/manic.

I don't think there's an easy fix for the quick-trigger if one is symptomatic or in an episode.  It's more about coping.

If I'm talking with family or someone close, I'll calmly say that I am getting very agitated/upset and ask to switch topics or table the conversation.  That might seem a bit awkward or abrupt, but stating the reality ("I'm about to explode, please bear with me..") is better than saying something hurtful or regrettable.

Catching oneself before the tipping point takes practice and mindfulness, for sure.  Deep breathing, focusing on the breath, and half-smiling (DBT skill) help me a ton, but I know I'm more into the hippie, crunchy-granola stuff than most folks.

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