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aura

Does this sound like anxiety?

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Pdoc told me "You're an anxious person" today. Isn't that sort of an insult? For a guy who likes to mince words - he avoids the word "psychotic" like it's the plague - it's strange that he would say something like that. 

I was trying to tell him that I'm dissociating. I feel like I'm in a parallel universe and I'm stuck in here with some evil entity. He blamed this on anxiety and after really bugging him about it also paranoia. Then he tries to explain the paranoia could just be anxiety anyway, so that's that. 

Whatever I'm glad he didn't want to up any of my medications, but what the hell is wrong with this guy. I tell him I'm getting signs from an evil supernatural entity and he tells me I'm an anxious person. 

Seriously guys... does what I'm describing sound like an anxiety problem? 

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That's kind of what my pdoc said to me too. I finally opened up more and went more in detail about my past delusions and she just told me that psychosis is a form of anxiety and basically that it's all anxiety. She did start me on abilify, though (but that didn't work out and I'm supposed to start on lamictal for the second time). 

But like I have anxiety too, and I can tell the difference between anxious thoughts like "no one likes me" and delusions like "there are monsters living inside my mirror and they're gonna kill me". 

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No it does not. I think some psychiatrists can be thrown off by people who know their symptoms and are aware of them. It's like the old thought that the only legit insane person is the person who doesn't realise it. I have mostly had this issue in the past with therapists, dismissal of my symptoms as a result of regular old stress or anxiety. I thought people around me were plotting to kill me at that point. You know, anxiety. Regular old anxiety. 

 

Edited by saintalto

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1 hour ago, aura said:

Pdoc told me "You're an anxious person" today. Isn't that sort of an insult? For a guy who likes to mince words - he avoids the word "psychotic" like it's the plague - it's strange that he would say something like that. 

I was trying to tell him that I'm dissociating. I feel like I'm in a parallel universe and I'm stuck in here with some evil entity. He blamed this on anxiety and after really bugging him about it also paranoia. Then he tries to explain the paranoia could just be anxiety anyway, so that's that. 

Whatever I'm glad he didn't want to up any of my medications, but what the hell is wrong with this guy. I tell him I'm getting signs from an evil supernatural entity and he tells me I'm an anxious person. 

Seriously guys... does what I'm describing sound like an anxiety problem? 

No, I agree with saintalto, it isn't. 

I think I would have asked him flat out why he was blaming everything you were telling him on anxiety.  And then not bothering to say anything more because all he was going to say it was anxiety.  I've done that except it wasn't anxiety that things were being blamed on.  And then ask him how feeling like you are being in a parallel universe is anxiety.

 

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The last doctor I saw said something similar in our first meeting about 'maybe it was all just anxiety'. I thought people were poisoning me, and that I had all these special messages for mankind about immortality, and was having spells where I was acting like a total fruitcake and wasn't in control of my own behaviour. In the following meeting she totally backtracked and said maybe it was something different. I think doctors like to take a bit of time to make their own considered opinion, and sometimes that comes across as not trusting us to tell our own stories right. Also I think some of them are very twitchy about the words psychosis or mania/hypomania. My old GP tried to remove the section of my medical notes that described my hallucinations, because he 'felt like it probably didn't happen' in our first appointment!

When I had my flu jab at a clinic last month I tried to make conversation by telling the doctor that I was unlucky enough to have had flu last year even though I'd been vaccinated. He very patronisingly told me that I was being silly and it had only been a cold. He had never met me before and hadn't asked any questions about my symptoms. If he had read my medical notes, he would have seen that my regular doctor categorically diagnosed flu based on the terrible fever, pain, full-body viral rash and the fact that it took until the 5th day of being ill before I could even drag myself the 100 metres to her office. I also have a PhD in microbiology. 

Urgh, arrogant doctors.

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Thank you. I don't know how to get through to my pdoc. I used to have a tdoc who specialized in psychosis and it was so nice to talk to her. She took my symptoms seriously. I hate feeling like the psychosis part of my illness is a secret that has to be masked by other things.

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1 minute ago, melissaw72 said:

Would it be worth it to find another pdoc?

I wonder about that sometimes, but then I think... would they treat me differently (med-wise). Probably not. I'm on two AAP's and a mood stabilizer. The only difference would be that I potentially wouldn't feel so anxious every time I meet him. But what if a different pdoc would be worse? That's what worries me.

I'm going to talk this out with my therapist and see if we can come up with a game plan for talking with him. She works with him, so she should have some insight into how he thinks. 

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8 minutes ago, aura said:

I wonder about that sometimes, but then I think... would they treat me differently (med-wise). Probably not. I'm on two AAP's and a mood stabilizer. The only difference would be that I potentially wouldn't feel so anxious every time I meet him. But what if a different pdoc would be worse? That's what worries me.

I'm going to talk this out with my therapist and see if we can come up with a game plan for talking with him. She works with him, so she should have some insight into how he thinks. 

(1 bold)  That is a worry I have too, thinking about if I ever had to have another pdoc.  I worry a new pdoc would change my meds to fit what they thought, regardless of records.

(2 bold)  You're right ... a new one could be worse.  If that happened maybe look for another one, but then it becomes such a hassle ... and then I'd probably think, 'is it worth it to find a new one.'

(3 bold)  I think that is a great idea to talk to your tdoc about it, especially since she works with him ... she might have a lot of insight about what he is like and how to approach him about this situation.  I really hope things work out. 

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I have never had a pdoc that just changed my meds, except for the period where I had been off meds for a year and a half and he wanted to rebuild my cocktail from scratch (but ultimately put me on the same meds I had been on before anyways, plus an AP and with a different AD).

There is a chance a new pdoc could be worse... but one won't have one that's better if you don't try. (Of course, this is why I have stayed with my current pdoc, despite her making two significant mistakes along the way - well, one of them was obvious, one she probably not have forseen.)

I do agree that talking this over with your tdoc first before you go to your pdoc's is a great idea. Probably a better idea for now than trying to find a new pdoc, which I would only do if your pdoc clearly shows themselves to be impossible to work with.

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