Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

Recommended Posts

Wondering if anyone has any good news to share about finding remission from refractory depression! Whether you've been partially or fully successful at getting your life back, please share your story :) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Since being on the combo Clozapine, Lithium, Adderall, and Cymbalta my refractory depression has almost disappeared. Most significantly, I'm barely suicidal anymore. I think beating refractory depression requires a pdoc that thinks outside of the box about what meds to use. I also believe a combo of more than one drug helps.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry, no advice or stories here, just also hoping for inspiration! I've tried about 15 different meds in every class and combo, plus 30 sessions of TMS and nothing... next step is maoi but I'm waiting on that. 

Mostly im just sick of doctors giving up... GPs brush off my fatigue as depression, had at least 5 pdocs just give up and refer me out, I even had a panic attack and went to urgent care and they reluctantly offered me an SSRI, instead of the benzo I begged for. I stormed out shaking with rage and lucky I made it home. Nothing works, nobody helps, nobody understands, I'm at the end of the road and scared to death. I guess there's still ECT but not excited about that...

  • Like 2
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, climber47 said:

Sorry, no advice or stories here, just also hoping for inspiration! I've tried about 15 different meds in every class and combo, plus 30 sessions of TMS and nothing... next step is maoi but I'm waiting on that. 

Mostly im just sick of doctors giving up... GPs brush off my fatigue as depression, had at least 5 pdocs just give up and refer me out, I even had a panic attack and went to urgent care and they reluctantly offered me an SSRI, instead of the benzo I begged for. I stormed out shaking with rage and lucky I made it home. Nothing works, nobody helps, nobody understands, I'm at the end of the road and scared to death. I guess there's still ECT but not excited about that...

Hi Climber47 - I feel exactly  the same as you...I've tried about 20 meds with little benefit, more side effects if anything. I get the brush off with GP doctors that are insensitive and just act like depression is normal, like a common cold or something to endure.

I'm told that this is "as good as it gets" yet this constant depressive state is intolerable. I have also been recommended TMS (expensive & time consuming it seems) and ECT (scared of the amnesia risks and/or becoming worse/ unstable)

I feel i'm at the end of the road also...hard to find any hope when doctors are out of ideas (except the extreme ECT stuff or TMS which I cannot afford)

 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry, not a success story but just wanted to say that I'm also sick of being given up on. Slight progress is considered successful treatment, but that's not enough for me. I don't want to be disabled. I'm currently on a trial of Rexulti but if that doesn't work out, I'm going to ask for ECT. My clinic does TMS, so of course they're gonna recommend that but I think TMS is largely over-hyped and over-marketed by Neurostar. I don't think the success rate is even that good. Modern ECT is much better and more humane than it used to be. After a multi-year depression, I fucking give up. Even with the risk of some memory loss, I say bring on the ECT. I just want to feel like a human being again. I guess ECT has a great success rate. I haven't even tried MAOI's or tricyclics. It's not that I'm against trying them but I just can't afford to wait for these long, 6-12 week medication trials that ultimately fail anyways.

Edited by DopamineSick

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, DopamineSick said:

Sorry, not a success story but just wanted to say that I'm also sick of being given up on. Slight progress is considered successful treatment, but that's not enough for me. I don't want to be disabled.

After a multi-year depression, I fucking give up. Even with the risk of some memory loss, I say bring on the ECT. I just want to feel like a human being again. I guess ECT has a great success rate. I haven't even tried MAOI's or tricyclics. It's not that I'm against trying them but I just can't afford to wait for these long, 6-12 week medication trials that ultimately fail anyways.

I know exactly how you feel!!! The slightest bit of progress/stability and doctors just send you on your way. I am so sick of paying thousands of dollars (including expensive hospital stays) withstanding long trials of different drugs only to feel about the same -  often with intolerable side effects...

I'm pretty scared of ECT because I guess I haven't heard many stories, and there is the old perception of treatment (because of the way they did ECT in the past). I've also heard that people have to go through like 20 or more treatments (I'm assuming over a period of many months not all together) So that aspect frightens me also, along with getting much worse possibly.

If you start, please post updates. Maybe eventually i will muster the courage to try ECT if I hear from others.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 hours ago, cloudmonger said:

I know exactly how you feel!!! The slightest bit of progress/stability and doctors just send you on your way. I am so sick of paying thousands of dollars (including expensive hospital stays) withstanding long trials of different drugs only to feel about the same -  often with intolerable side effects...

I'm pretty scared of ECT because I guess I haven't heard many stories, and there is the old perception of treatment (because of the way they did ECT in the past). I've also heard that people have to go through like 20 or more treatments (I'm assuming over a period of many months not all together) So that aspect frightens me also, along with getting much worse possibly.

If you start, please post updates. Maybe eventually i will muster the courage to try ECT if I hear from others.

If I ever get ECT, I will try to post updates. But you know what's weird? I have a feeling my pdoc won't approve it! There will be some excuse, like I need to try more meds. Or that my current treatment is "successful" (as long as I'm not on the verge of doing myself in on a 24/7 basis). Or that TMS is "better" (because my clinic offers it). I just have very little confidence that my pdoc will approve it. That's just the way things have gone with me and pdocs. I get a lot of resistance even though I'm probably one of the best informed patients they have. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, DopamineSick said:

 I have a feeling my pdoc won't approve it! There will be some excuse, like I need to try more meds. Or that my current treatment is "successful" (as long as I'm not on the verge of doing myself in on a 24/7 basis). Or that TMS is "better" (because my clinic offers it). I just have very little confidence that my pdoc will approve it. That's just the way things have gone with me and pdocs. I get a lot of resistance even though I'm probably one of the best informed patients they have. 

I have the same feeling....like what is considered "successful" treatment? Just because you aren't actively trying to kill yourself and you are not hospital-bound? There are indeed so many barriers to getting the help we need.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes! I think my psychiatrist is pretty good. He's the only one that I've went (and I've seen more than a couple) that has recognized I have MDD and not situational depression. He's the only one to read my psychiatric history all the way back to when I was 3 years old. I am worried that after some time he will give up on me. My mom told me I should shoot for a 4/10 depression which breaks my heart. I don't want to be moderately depressed for the rest of my life. I want to be able to function well. I want to be able to brush my teeth everyday. Just because I'm not thinking about dying everyday does not mean I am better :( 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a second hand story sort of... I met with a new pdoc, actually an arnp but she's won Seattle top doc awards, etc., for whatever that's worth so I thought I'd try her... she had me do the genetic test to see how meds are metabolized, and said she had a patient just like me, she'd tried every class of med and even ECT, but factors in her genetic test led my doc to prescribe her Pristique, even though she said she never would have tried it because she'd already tried others in that class, but it worked!

if you're in as deep as I am, you've probably had the genetic test but just one more thing to ask for if nothing else has worked.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
15 hours ago, climber47 said:

she had me do the genetic test to see how meds are metabolized, and said she had a patient just like me, she'd tried every class of med and even ECT, but factors in her genetic test led my doc to prescribe her Pristique, even though she said she never would have tried it because she'd already tried others in that class, but it worked!

if you're in as deep as I am, you've probably had the genetic test but just one more thing to ask for if nothing else has worked.

I wish I could find a pdoc who I felt really gives a damn. Literally, they all seem to think as long as I'm not sobbing everyday, panicked, homicidal or suicidal I am stable & good to go. It's beyond discouraging....

I really have to exaggerate my symptoms in order for docs to take them seriously. I swear I don't act or present like a know-it-all, yet I've been suffering with this illness, dealing with side effects, researching meds & trying options for 20 years (probably much longer than some doctors have studied) I'd like to think I know a few things or have some good ideas.

docs rarely want to look into research I've read or take my suggestions. I inquire about genetic testing, forward case studies & articles & they just sort of shrug or act like they know nothing about it. Or they feel that pursuing these options is insignificant/useless. I just don't know what to do - I have bare bones insurance and cannot afford spending $500+ on a well known psychiatrist or motivated pdoc.

Edited by cloudmonger

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • Similar Content

    • By thebakerbunny
      Hi, all. I feel like a newb oldie: been on here a while, still feel dumb as shit with all the o chem breakdowns and acronyms.
      Anyway- I've been maxed out on effexor xr for years now. I've taken it pretty consistently for...12 years? with a few breaks to try something new. There aren't many details I can remember well (always had a bad memory, now it's basically a vestigial feature), but here's what I've garnered: 
      *SSRIs and i seem to not mix. Not just some side effects, but all the side effects, and no or negative improvement.
      *wellbutrin did nothing for me. Not good, not bad- just nothing. 
      *Effexor was good- great, even- before I tapped out. I've just been staying with it till I can figure something out.
      *currently, I take 225 mg Effexor (and several doctors have told me now that they flat out won't go above that), 150 lamictal, and klonopin and Ambien as needed. (And as I've been mightily depressed lately...I've been "as needing" them a lot more.)
       
      I've been wanting to change for a while now, and I've been studying up to see what might be some better options, but haven't had a tdoc or pdoc in the meantime. I'm meeting new ones shortly and I want to take some suggestions to them. Problem is that I'm allergic to a few things, with varying degrees of severity and type of allergic reactions. Any suggestions of SNRIs, TCAs, or MAOIs that aren't: 
      *sulfa-meds (full body hives. Like...full body- between my toes, in my buttcrack...😬)
      *compazine (difficult breathing, light anaphylaxis.)
      *darvocet, Vicodin (full-blown anaphylaxis.)
       
      I have been given morphine with no reaction (so, what- does this mean that synethics cause issues, but cleaner natural versions don't?), and take imitrex regularly. I'm not smart enough to understand all of the individual components, and too ADD to have the patience to learn which causes what.
      I feel like it's got be something pretty potent, since I've been middling- to severely-depressed pretty constantly (easily 8 out those 12 years), but I also don't need anything that's going to make me lethargic. Apathetic, fine- just please, no serious drowsiness.  
      I defer to you guys and gals and pals for what your thoughts are on what might be most effective, but also won't send me to the ER.
       
    • By Adolf
      "Best" as in being effective with fewer side effects. Which ones were the best for you? Which ones did you take? What condition(s) did you treat? What side effects did you get? How did the antipsychotics compare to "conventional" antidepressants?
      Can antipsychotics be an alternative to "conventional" antidepressants? What are the risks? What are the benefits? Do they make you a tomato with time? Psychiatrists prescribe them more often in recent times, it seems.
    • By Blahblah
      Have a strong itch to drop Effexor...(I won't go cold turkey). It stopped my dysphoric crying spells, but now, 10 months later, I'm feeling increasingly flat, apathetic, numb, no motivation (even after dropping to 75mg). I hate how all A/Ds have this lobotomy effect on me longterm. It's initially fine in acute episodes, I'm not sad now, but I can't function properly, and I continue to score Moderate-Severe on the depression scale.
      I think it's counteracting my Ritalin (which I increased to 30-40mg)? I don't want to increase Effexor above 150mg, I'd never be able to go off.
      I'm trying dosing at night instead, will this make any difference @mikl_pls ? I skipped yesterday's morning dose (then came the intense nausea, over stimulation & brain slosh awfulness @10 hours later) and I took my dose with dinner.
      I'm seriously considering going on low-dose mild SSRI instead (Prozac?) I'm sensitive to meds & side effects, and I'm also VERY worried about withdrawals. Especially from Effexor, they are the WORST, and I just read study that Effexor withdrawal syndrome is not dose-dependent:
      https://www.researchgate.net/publication/7402189_Venlafaxine_and_Serious_Withdrawal_Symptoms_Warning_to_Drivers
      https://metro.co.uk/2018/01/24/woman-shares-coming-off-antidepressant-ruined-life-7255570/
       
       
    • By Blahblah
      Forgot to take Lamictal yesterday (I took my other meds). Holy Hell, I took my dose today (on schedule) and I STILL feel awful!!  I've only been on 100mg....I thought Lamictal had a super-long half-life? Yesterday went like this:
      10am - up, had breakfast
      11am – slight Brain “swishes” started (was out the entire day)
      12pm – Stronger Brain zaps start
      1:30pm – Lunch (meat, salad/veg)
      2:30pm – Sudden extreme exhaustion
      4pm - more brain zaps =>  ZAP ZAP ZAP! 🤯
      7pm - Irritability starts
      11pm – Tea, bedtime, could not fall asleep (I haven't had insomnia in 2+ years)
      ...Night sweats…Restless legs.....
      12am – Ruminations, feel weepy
      ..Insomnia ensues…(Toss & turn, sweaty/achey all night)
      It's now 12pm,and I am STILL having brain zaps! I worry I’ll never be able ever taper, switch from, or withdraw from this med. You probably think well, with MI, WHY would you ever go off it? For me, longterm, these meds are band-aids. There is always a price.  Ok, maybe great at preventing acute/severe depression, but as a result, they rob me of any spark, joy, elation, happiness, libido, sexual sensation/response, feelings of reward, love.... This disturbs me. I used to know what positive emotions felt like…
      So I’m stable, existing.....but still lacking will or any interest in living....
    • By Blahblah
      Good God, my habitual oversleeping is worsening.....I literally cannot get up before 11am. I know this is probably due to the fact that yes, I'm depressed and do not have anything of purpose at the moment to wake up for.....PLUS winter weather that's dark as Hell.....PLUS on a stupid stimulant break, until I can get in to see pdoc in 5 days.
      Are there any other tactics you've used?? I'm going to bed same time every night (by 11pm). I sleep really well entire night. WTF.
      I tried a sunlamp thing in the past and it made me headachey & irritable. Even when I go for walks during the day, it doesn't help.
×
×
  • Create New...