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Flash

Hallucination night of terror from hell

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Last night and this morning I was terrorized by literally hundreds and hundreds of hallucinations, auditory, visual, and tactile (and combinations). The last two are New developments for me. My auditory hallucinations are generally very loud and startling, and last night was no different. Music, voices, noises, crashes, screams, crying, laughing (and remember these are all very loud), and then coupled with visual and tactile hallucinations makes for an incredibly terrifying combination.
 
I was being attacked by animals, by the police on loudspeaker telling me to surrender with blaring lights and sirens, and then crashing through my bedroom window on this construction device (sorry, but I don't know what it's called), what sounded like a bomb going off in my living room, screaming infants, weird dolls flying at me from the corner of the room, Ghosts, people breaking into my downstairs, and stuff like that. 
 
I was up, running away from things hurtling through the air trying to harm me, investigating non-existent break-ins, investigating neighbors shouting in the hall who weren't there, and stuff like that. And then there was the damn clock radio, which is where it all started. When it first went off, I spent a long time fidgeting with it trying to turn the damn thing off, before I finally realized I was hallucinating. And then it went off whenever I didn't look at it, and then immediately stopped when I did look at it. 
 
And on and on it went, for hours and hours. And it would go off while the other hallucinations were happening, producing a horrible cacaphony of terror. After a while, my heart was racing, I was almost hyperventilating, and shaking terribly. That continued on for some time after the hallucinations finally, mercifully stopped.
 
Has anyone else experienced anything like this? I've had some bad psychotic episodes before, including some really ghastly command hallucinations, and some cuckoo delusions, but the sheer volume, speed, and ferocity of this attack was unlike anything I have come across before. 
Edited by Flash

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I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

This happened to me when I was starting to hear voices/sounds, and was off of meds because I didn't tell pdoc about the voices and everything. (and had gone off the other meds in general because of that)

The only way it stopped was going back on meds.  It wasn't just one med that helped ... don't remember the combo except that there was definitely an AP and a mood stabilizer in the mix.  I'm sorry I can't be more specific ... that time in my life was an off and on blur.  But all the clashes/clanging/voices/sounds/etc all heard at once, I do remember those times ... they were hell to get through.  I remember one time they were happening and somehow I fell asleep.  Woke up and they weren't there.  They came back, but point being that sleep really helps.

Lack of sleep and stress make them worse (for me).

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That sounds terrifying. The only thing I've ever experienced even close - and it's not at all close - to that was when I was very manic. I was hallucinating shadows flying all round me (I thought they were angels). I hid in my room. Eventually I saw the angel Gabriel possess my cat and he chased them off.

Can you take something tomorrow night to ward off the hallucinations?

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52 minutes ago, melissaw72 said:

I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

This happened to me when I was starting to hear voices/sounds, and was off of meds because I didn't tell pdoc about the voices and everything. (and had gone off the other meds in general because of that)

The only way it stopped was going back on meds.  It wasn't just one med that helped ... don't remember the combo except that there was definitely an AP and a mood stabilizer in the mix.  I'm sorry I can't be more specific ... that time in my life was an off and on blur.  But all the clashes/clanging/voices/sounds/etc all heard at once, I do remember those times ... they were hell to get through.  I remember one time they were happening and somehow I fell asleep.  Woke up and they weren't there.  They came back, but point being that sleep really helps.

Lack of sleep and stress make them worse (for me).

I'm sorry you went through this too. Sleep definitely affects things for me, and I suppose I have been on the very low end of that lately. I was going to try to get to my zypexa, but there were all kinds of things assaulting me all the time, and I couldn't get to it. I will take it tonight for sure.

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1 hour ago, aura said:

That sounds terrifying. The only thing I've ever experienced even close - and it's not at all close - to that was when I was very manic. I was hallucinating shadows flying all round me (I thought they were angels). I hid in my room. Eventually I saw the angel Gabriel possess my cat and he chased them off.

Can you take something tomorrow night to ward off the hallucinations?

Yeah, I will take Zyprexa. But Everything gets worse and worse with age for me. And the episodes come out of left field for no reason. I had a complete meltdown just a few days ago, and I am worried about ending up IP because of the crayzee, and I just CANNOT have that happen. My entire life would collapse if that happened right now. I'm just trying to keep the house of cards balanced. I suppose it's a fool's errand in the end, but I don't have any other options. 

Edited by Flash

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1 minute ago, Flash said:

Yeah, I will take Zyprexa. But Everything gets worse and worse with age for me. And the episodes come out of left field for no reason. I had a complete meltdown only 2-3 days ago, and I am worried about ending up IP because of the crayzee, and I just CANNOT have that happen. My entire life would collapse if that happened right now. I'm just trying to keep the house of cards balanced. I suppose it's a fool's errand in the end, but I don't have any other options. 

I hope you can avoid IP, but I've found sometimes that it's the best option out of a lot of crappy options. Your health needs to come first at some point, whatever that means (IP or otherwise). I'm worried about you.

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23 minutes ago, Flash said:

I'm sorry you went through this too. Sleep definitely affects things for me, and I suppose I have been on the very low end of that lately. I was going to try to get to my zypexa, but there were all kinds of things assaulting me all the time, and I couldn't get to it. I will take it tonight for sure.

I hope it works successfully for you tonight.

 

 

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A little over two years ago, I tried to escape an auditory hallucination by running from it. Well, I can't run because of medical conditions, but I tried eveything else. It followed me everywhere all across downtown, whether I was walking, on the streetcar, on my bike, or in an elevator. It just wasn't going away. It finally STFU after I took Zyprexa and conked out, but it's disturbing how these things can torment you. Normal people don't have to deal with this shit, nor can they understand it. I always think I must have been a really horrible person in a past life to deserve this kind or torment, but I don't believe in that stuff. Well, except when I'm manic. Ugh. 

Edited by Flash

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That sounds horrifying, Flash. I've had scary hallucinations before, but nothing close to that. I can't even imagine it. I hope tonight will be a better night. 

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I've had something similar a few times. At first it would be a creepy, wired feeling in the late evening. Then it would develop into being convinced there was a malicious presence in the room/house with me. Then a few times it has gotten really bad and I can see monsters in the room with me, and if I close my eyes I can still terrifying visions and hear loud crashes. It would keep me awake until 5am and then once it was light I might be able to sleep for 2-3 hours, or sometimes nap a little during the day. The sleep deprivation was a vicious cycle and after a couple of months I was in a real mess and never really felt fully awake or asleep - it was horrible! I couldn't eat because it was so stressful and the doctor thought I had an ulcer (but it wasn't confirmed by endoscopy).

If it's still happening in a couple of weeks then definitely get your doctor involved, before the sleep deprivation gets worse. But I've had a few times where it's cleared up by itself with a bit of self-care after about 4 days, so you might be lucky.

 

These things helped me:

- Sleeping tablets (amitriptyline). I was like a zombie the next day, but when it got to the point of needing sleep at any cost (after several months) they were fantastic.

- Listening to music or watching TV while I fell asleep, to give my mind something to be distracted by.

- Sleeping in a different house, with more people around. Especially sleeping in the same room/bed as someone else.

- Talking or singing to the presence, to pacify it. Last time this happened to me (relatively mildly) I couldn't go up the stairs to bed because the presence wouldn't let me use the stairs, but when I sang for it and included it in what I was doing it chilled out just enough that I managed to sneak up. I had to keep the lights on all night which wasn't ideal, but I did manage to get some sleep. Except for when it burst into the room at 4am and scared the bejeezus out of me.

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The good news is that it hasn't returned since I've been taking the Zyprexa. I just don't understand why, out of the blue, I get assaulted by this kind of stuff. I just want some peace. 

Edited by Flash

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Sounds terrifying, Flash. I'm glad the Zyprexa has been helping. Sorry things are so shitty for you. 

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Oh no that is awful! Sounds like a terrifying and confusing time. I recently had an auditory hallucination that drove me crazy, but not many at a time, wow. I am so sorry you went through that!!

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I just worry that I'm going to have more and more of this in the future. I also started having aural illusions again (voices or music that piggyback on white noise sources). Those I can deal with, because they're much softer, and I can always turn the offending source off. They're still a nuisance, though, and I need a certain amount of peace and quiet. 

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That does sound like nightmare. I'm sorry you went through it. I haven't experienced anything that extreme, but at times had maybe less severe symptoms like that. Times where I was really afraid with racing thoughts and noises in my head, jumping at shadows. Kind of like being in a bad dream. I hope you get some help and don't have any recurrence.

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