Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

Recommended Posts

Hi CBers,

So one of the things on my to-do list today is to make a list of self-care or self-soothing things I can refer to when I'm going batshit. I have a couple already, like sit in the sun, buy a plant, etc, etc, but, I was wondering which activities you do to make yourself feel better.

Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

-Alice

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Reminisce about the times that put a massive smile on my face. For example, there was a time when I purposely sneezed in my best friend's face (I know really disgusting and childish, I was about 14 then) and the knee jerk response from him was priceless! That always makes me laugh.

Shower. Something I never really appreciate for the longest time but it does actually make me feel physically good.

Watching a film/playing a computer game/listening to a music album I really would like for the bad days.

Help around the house. Helping other people helps you.

Listening to really up beat music, something which is the epitome of positivity. For me it's the Polar Bear Café soundtrack, the only anime I've ever liked.

Do something to improve my situation such as learning a skill like HTML, working on passing my theory test. This takes a lot of effort though because too often I'm not in that mood - that goes along with the depression of course.

Do some yoga. Really simple. Doesn't require a lot of thought or movement - or energy! But it calms me down and gives me a feeling of zen for a while.

This is all from a piece of paper I have, I call it my 'Depression Survival Guide'.

Oh, and I always listen to extracts from the Ricky Gervais Show on YouTube. Karl Pilkington is an amazing guy with some really funny thoughts and stories, Steven Merchant has a great sense of humour and Ricky Gervais has a brilliant laugh.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was trying to think of something today. I wanted to treat myself, but not with food.

It isn't really soothing, but I am getting a manicure. 

I like music. I forget about it but I enjoy listening

I have a soft blanket that I like to bundle up in when it is cold

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with the comedy.  I like Eddie Izzard.  He's smart funny.

beyond that, I tend to go to sensory stuff.  Music, bubble bath, looking at pictures from a better time or really good trip I went on, walking outside in nature and paying attention to the scenery, depending on what i'm soothing i have a weighted blanket to calm me down, use a lotion with a scent i really like.  There's a longer list - this has some of them - http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/self-sooth.html.

See also http://creativityintherapy.com/2016/05/create-a-sensory-self-soothing-kit/  I like their ideas, though I'm not sure you need to do the box.  Maybe it helps though?  Haven't tried it.

my last main one is meditation of some flavor.  I have an app on my phone with a gazillion options, so I choose one and see if I'm able to follow it.  I can't always  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes I just have to ride it out because if I am feeling out of control, angry, and/or more, my mind can't calm down enough to try to do anything (ie ideas listed in above posts).

What works for me is to sit by myself, with absolutely no noise (one ounce of noise will set me off again), maybe just stare at the TV.  Sometimes I fall asleep, and when I wake up I am doing a little better (some of the times).

My 2 cents.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Depends what batshit is. I don't know what that is and from experience it is different for each person that has goes into such states of batshit. 

I don't call my skills in this area self-soothing, because for what I use them for they are the opposite, which may be counterproductive for you, so I don't want to share things that might make the situation worse. 

Above suggestions seem wise, if it is legitimate soothing you are after. Kind of wish I needed that, but I have the opposite problem. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Animals are among the best for me.  No matter how down I am, my stupid cat will always find a way to amuse me.  Dogs and other cats too, but my cat especially.  Animals are just so weird and silly, I can't help but smile.

Also, certain types of exercise.  Running is often a no-go. If I'm starting to get depression, then the weighed down feeling will just make me feel slow and weak if I run.  Climbing or really grinding away on the elliptical with motivating music are more likely to help. 

If the batshit is total irritation at everything, ready to throw plates out the window because I'm mad at them for being dirty kinda stuff, then often the only answer is taking a break.  Maybe even a nap.  Me, alone, dark room, ugly cry to release tension, fall asleep.  Exercise can help with this mood sometimes too.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There is a birdfeeder in my tiny backyard. Watching and especially listening to the birds calms me down. Also looking at trees. Looking at the leaves, seeing the leaves or the branches against the sky, watching leaves move in the breeze. This keeps me afloat while I am down. I love the bridfeeder. Seeing the living creatures doing their various things brings me out of myself.

When I am hypo/manic, I spend hours "shopping" on the internet, putting things in my cart and then abandoning them. It gives me pleasure to go through the process of choosing things to "buy" but I stop myself before I spend a crapton of money on stuff I don't need.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, theforest said:

When I am hypo/manic, I spend hours "shopping" on the internet, putting things in my cart and then abandoning them. It gives me pleasure to go through the process of choosing things to "buy" but I stop myself before I spend a crapton of money on stuff I don't need.

I have problem stints of compulsively shopping on Amazon, I don't think it's a hypo thing, but because I am insanely bored!! I do exercise caution & never buy on impulse. I spend hours putting together particular lists, reading all the reviews, looking at user photos, selecting the "perfect" item and then it gets saved into my Wish list for several days. Then I try to conveniently forget about certain items. During those several days, I click through the wish list and try to rate/assess how much I really need the item. I also try not to order multiples of the same thing....but when it says that there is only 1 item left in stock - I break down and make the purchase. :(

It's tough sometimes, because I know it is a feeble attempt to fill an empty void. I do this at cheap stores like forever21, target, h&m, grocery store makeup or thrift shops.  It also is a means of avoiding important tasks & chores. I feel like I am doing a "job" I get a bit of a lift when my coveted item arrives, and then the feeling of reward & distraction is quickly gone like within 3 days. Rinse, repeat...I guess there are worse compulsions...but I cannot recover from it. i try to make out with purchases under $100.

Is this super common for other people here too?? Do you really believe it is always a Bipolar thing?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry was a bit of main topic (above comment) Self Soothing ideas:

Listening to either stress-relieving classical music or upbeat music (depending on mood state/situation)

Sleeping in a quiet room

Showering/taking a bath

Sensory stuff like: Candles, scented soap, putting on lotions, trying makeup, giving myself a manicure.

Exercise (ideally intensive which is the most distracting)

Cooking or buying ingredients for a new recipe

Reading a trashy magazine (low level of concentration necessary)

Making a gratitude list (sometimes this doesn't work at all)

Reading a book of meditations about life

Making a Wish list or Life Goals list

Comedy talks on Youtube

Silly/cute animal videos on Youtube

Emailing a friend/family member or someone to tell them how important they are to you (i.e. focusing on someone else)

Journaling the emotions/thoughts out on paper

Looking at photos of good times, or organizing photos on laptop

Coming to CB when all the above fails!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
17 minutes ago, Blahblah said:

I have problem stints of compulsively shopping on Amazon, I don't think it's a hypo thing, but because I am insanely bored!! I do exercise caution & never buy on impulse. I spend hours putting together particular lists, reading all the reviews, looking at user photos, selecting the "perfect" item and then it gets saved into my Wish list for several days. Then I try to conveniently forget about certain items. During those several days, I click through the wish list and try to rate/assess how much I really need the item. I also try not to order multiples of the same thing....but when it says that there is only 1 item left in stock - I break down and make the purchase. :(

It's tough sometimes, because I know it is a feeble attempt to fill an empty void. I do this at cheap stores like forever21, target, h&m, grocery store makeup or thrift shops.  It also is a means of avoiding important tasks & chores. I feel like I am doing a "job" I get a bit of a lift when my coveted item arrives, and then the feeling of reward & distraction is quickly gone like within 3 days. Rinse, repeat...I guess there are worse compulsions...but I cannot recover from it. i try to make out with purchases under $100.

Is this super common for other people here too?? Do you really believe it is always a Bipolar thing?

I do a similar thing, obsessively search for items to buy online. I don't make wishlists though, and its always things I need but can't buy due to my income. If I do buy them, I feel very guilty for allowing myself to have things I need, because I usually only buy food as a punishment. 

I do it more if I am bored, and especially if my anhedonia is bothering me, and I have tried other activities that are meant to be enjoyable and are not for me because of my depression.

Anhedonia is my worst depression symptom (well aside from suicidiality) and I don't have much tolerance for it. The tolerance I do have just makes it worse, because its very difficult to find a meaning and purpose to live when you can't enjoy anything, or adequately stimulate your brain and senses, at least for me. 

Its also just a routine and habit, which I get stuck in easily. Void certainly helps none, and I have quite a large one. 

I also do it when I am irritable/frustrated and feeling hopeless when nothing I do helps me at all. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Hopelessly Broken

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Hopelessly Broken said:

I do a similar thing, obsessively search for items to buy online. I don't make wishlists though, and its always things I need but can't buy due to my income. If I do buy them, I feel very guilty for allowing myself to have things I need, because I usually only buy food as a punishment. 

I do it more if I am bored, and especially if my anhedonia is bothering me, and I have tried other activities that are meant to be enjoyable and are not for me because of my depression.

Anhedonia is my worst depression symptom (well aside from suicidiality) and I don't have much tolerance for it. The tolerance I do have just makes it worse, because its very difficult to find a meaning and purpose to live when you can't enjoy anything, or adequately stimulate your brain and senses, at least for me. 

Its also just a routine and habit, which I get stuck in easily. Void certainly helps none, and I have quite a large one.

I completely agree - anhedonia is my worst symptom at the moment. Things that typically give others pleasure don't often work for me. My therapist says to do these things "positive things" anyway, which sometimes is impossible.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes. It is more depressing than doing nothing most of the time, because at least then you aren't necessarily effected by how other people gain something you can't experience. 

It actually contributes to these types of skills not working also, for me. Distraction just draws more attention to it. 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • Similar Content

    • By Go Ask Alice
      Just a little step in self-soothing. Hopefully all of my elements will fall together nicely, and I'll finally have a serene place to exist.
      Happily?
    • By Washington Park Commons
      I'm making baked beans tonight. Boston baked beans. I've never made them before, so it should be interesting. Since I don't have bean pot and my dutch oven in wrapped up, I splurged and bought a crock pot- that's a slow cooker to all you younger people out there.

      My mother has a slow cooker. She only used it when it was fashionable. I think mine will get more use. It can be hard to cook when working crazy hours, and with the slow cooker I can make sure that my food can cook while I'm sleeping.

      Boston baked beans contain molasses, one of the items in the Triangle Trade. The other two items were rum and slaves. Slaves were brought from West Africa and taken down to the Caribbean where they were sold to owners of sugar plantations. The ship captains then bought sugar, brought it up to Boston, and sold it to factors. Then the sugar was brought to Europe to sweeten tea and make rum, which was then sold back to African chieftains in exchange for slaves, and to American colonists in exchange for the cotton farmed by slaves to feed the mills of England. And that's one of the ways America grew.

      That's what's so amusing (yes, a real knee-slapper) about racists thinking that black people aren't 'American.' We're as American as apple-fucking-pie. In fact, so is Islam - it's one of the religions brought over by West African slaves (the other major one was various forms of animism, or the worship of nature and all living and inanimate things; lots of young white people like to call it 'paganism', which it is, but only in relation to Christianity and Judaism). Islam ended up in Africa because Arab traders used to buy slaves and sell goods to Africans, and sometimes conquered whole swathes of Africa by the sword long before Europeans showed up. That's how most religions end up somewhere. People meet, trade and learn about other ideas, and/or people meet, trade, get greedy, and take what they want, while converting anyone who gets in their way. So goeth the way of the world. Incidentally, that's how Europe became mostly Christian.

      What does any of this have to do with insanity? Nothing. Except that my particular forms of craziness have to do with planes flying into buildings, adults who harm children and other helpless creatures, the Catholic Church claiming to love everyone while making it clear that it only loves those who become its slaves or who can be co-opted after death (ask Dorothy Day, Hildegard von Bingen, or even my fave, Francis of Assisi), or the plight of being female and black and queer in a world that looks down on all three states of being.

      I'm reminded how, before I was medicated, I would sometimes drift in a fugue state, completely convinced for weeks at a time I was invisible, and that there was some forcefield around me that barely kept others from walking into me. I know why - everything in my life has conspired to make me feel invisible, and to feel wrong for being angry about it, and to feel guilty for wanting to do damage to the people who are directly and indirectly for my forced detachment from humanity. Unfortunately I'm now medicated and I know that I have every right to be angry; I know how much I'm angry, how much damage feeling like a non-human did to me, and who exactly did the damage. In a different universe, I would be a hitwoman or a serial killer. But instead, I will follow the lessons handed down to me from other people of color, other queers, other women. Instead of letting my fury eat me whole as it did for years, I've turned the energy down to mere anger, and I want to use that righteous anger to make sure the world doesn't get the chance to create more people like me. I understand life is unfair, but it doesn't have to be unfair the way it was to me. I'm not taking on the guilt my oppressors wanted me to feel anymore. They can fucking suck it. Instead, I'll remember that no matter how we ended up getting the recipe for Boston baked beans, the sweat equity my people of all kinds put in makes it as much my recipe as anybody else's.
    • By Washington Park Commons
      I have two posts today. The first one I wrote will be put up after this one.

      I wet into Manhattan today to pick up the printer that my father's money paid for. The trip was all planned out. Go to the Western Union place, get the money, go get the printer, come home. However, my plans changed a little bit, and it was all good.

      For those of you not familiar with NYC, the WTC was right near the Hudson River. It's on the western side of Manhattan in an area known as the Financial District. Across from where it was, on Broadway, is St. Paul's Chapel. St. Paul's is part of Trinity Episcopal, and it's the church that was used by tired firefighters and other first responders after the disaster as a place to sleep and regroup. I was raised Roman Catholic and although I no longer practice, I love a good church, especially since I refuse to go into a Catholic one (unless I go to Paris and visit Notre Dame or when my mother dies, the Church has pretty much seen the back of me). I fell in love with St. Paul's years ago, long before 9/11, because the pews were like home to me. It was even featured in a book on the 50 Quiet Places in New York.

      When 9/11 came around, one of the things that hurt was losing one of my safe harbors. The whole area was cordoned off. Again, I felt cut off from a beloved church (my break with Catholicism, regardless of my belief or lack of same, feels like a wound that will always bleed a little and never fully close; it took me years to realize how deeply my identity is embedded in being a Catholic). Liberal Episcopalianism is essentially Catholic-lite (Less filling! No calories! Now with more acceptance of gays, unwed mothers and lost souls! Missing the intense veneration of the Virgin Mary, but three out of four isn't bad!), so at times I will take in an Episcopal service or two, and St. Paul's was my favorite place downtown to do that. For a while tough that was untenable due to the church being cordoned off, and later due to the heebie jeebies I got when I came near the area (I could teach at some of the colleges nearby, but that block was my cut-off point).

      The past few years though it's become home again, although the ghosts haunt me and the tourists sometimes throw me into a PTSD-induced rage. However I try to get in there once a week or so since i pass there a great dal. Today was one of those days and it was good. The church was near empty, and there was a short prayer for the living and the dead, and for peace. I thought of Syria and Egypt, and the people who died on our fateful day (including the terrorists; I pray for them too)and other victims of violence. i even prayed for the guy who brutally raped and held those woman, and killed himself yesterday. After all, if I take St Francis as seriously as I say I do, I would have to do that. All the glee i felt last night when hearing of his death disappeared when i thought of his family and the pain he caused them as well as others.

      Then I picked up my money and had a delicious bahn-mi, a Vietnamese sandwich that is off the charts, and found myself striking up a conversation with a Chinese woman who was having pho. We talked about the joys of Asian cuisine, where to get great bagels, and what makes knishes so good. It felt nice to have a conversation that didn't involve medication, sitting inside the house, suicide attempts, not wanting to take care of oneself, or general excuses for staying crazy. The woman's name was Chris. Sitting with her made me happy.

      i picked up my printer and came home. I feel a lot more affirmed about life right now than I have in days. I think of how I would be feeling nothing right now if I had killed myself two weeks ago, like I was momentarily tempted to. My meds are working, people seem to like me, and slowly but surely I seem to be coming to life again.
×
×
  • Create New...