uhwt Posted May 1, 2017 Share Posted May 1, 2017 Got my dx at the beginning of my 17's. i'm 20 now and it's so hard to get a steady medication. There's always a problem, if I get a good medication, then I start shaking or whatever because of freaking s*** lithium. There's nothing to do with that disease, it's chronic it'll always chase you back, cant live my whole life like that >< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yuna Posted May 1, 2017 Share Posted May 1, 2017 10 hours ago, uhwt said: Got my dx at the beginning of my 17's. i'm 20 now and it's so hard to get a steady medication. There's always a problem, if I get a good medication, then I start shaking or whatever because of freaking s*** lithium. There's nothing to do with that disease, it's chronic it'll always chase you back, cant live my whole life like that >< I feel like shit right now too. My med causes weird dreams and sexual dysfunction. I realized today I am tired of this. Fucking tired of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
getouttamyway.exe Posted May 1, 2017 Share Posted May 1, 2017 (edited) just when it feels like you are getting your head screwed on straight, I crash again, will it ever end? I always hate when people tell me "it will get better there is more to life" its like, it might get better for a bit, but It always gets worse, and it never ends. I have thought more than once, there is only one way to stop the cycling. Trigger warning, I have an "emergency box" with multiple steps, timing for when to take what, and ultimately slip away from cyanide poisoning. Just in case you feel? Edited May 1, 2017 by getouttamyway.exe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uhwt Posted May 1, 2017 Author Share Posted May 1, 2017 (edited) seems like the only ppl who can understand got the disease. I mean, even the pdoc doesen't completely understand it... he's able to cure it and everything, yes. He knows the symptoms, the med to cure it and blablabla. But did they even get to deal with this sh**t? 2 hours ago, getouttamyway.exe said: just when it feels like you are getting your head screwed on straight, I crash again, will it ever end? I always hate when people tell me "it will get better there is more to life" its like, it might get better for a bit, but It always gets worse, and it never ends. I have thought more than once, there is only one way to stop the cycling. Trigger warning, I have an "emergency box" with multiple steps, timing for when to take what, and ultimately slip away from cyanide poisoning. Just in case you feel? I hate it so much too when ppl are saying things to me just to reassure. Everything they say is bullsh**... u can't do anything with this disease, even if u get med. Don't make me believe there will be no symptoms and everything's gonna be alright. The only thing they should do is listen to us and I think that would be enough. And the thing I hate the most about it is always requestioning myself about what a bipolar will be able to do in life. I only got 20, before the disease came out I was a very ambitious guy, wanted to go to university etc... I knew I was smarter than a lot of people, that I could do a lot of things. Now everything of this is going away, my strong point in this life was to be smart. Now, I get my head almost 2-3 months a year? I don't think u'll ready it all, but anyways. Story of my life. Edited May 1, 2017 by uhwt sorry for my english, im a french canadian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gearhead Posted May 1, 2017 Share Posted May 1, 2017 30 minutes ago, uhwt said: seems like the only ppl who can understand got the disease. And that, my friend, is exactly why we are here. Because you're right. You can say anything here, and someone will know just what you mean. Do you feel as though lithium really works for you? What symptoms is it controlling? It's pretty much the first med doctors try on newly diagnosed bipolar patients, but it's not for everyone. It sucked for me, and for many others here. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uhwt Posted May 2, 2017 Author Share Posted May 2, 2017 1 hour ago, Gearhead said: And that, my friend, is exactly why we are here. Because you're right. You can say anything here, and someone will know just what you mean. Do you feel as though lithium really works for you? What symptoms is it controlling? It's pretty much the first med doctors try on newly diagnosed bipolar patients, but it's not for everyone. It sucked for me, and for many others here. I'm very sensible to medication ajustment. A little dose can change a lot of things for myself. What is happening now is that I wanted to changed my medication a little bit because lithium made me shaking. I wasn't shaking a lot, but it's kinda REALLY annoying when you got a girlfriend or even when you need to be very steady for something in particular. For myself, that was about sciences at school. Couldn't manipulate biology things under microscope without shaking so much, making me kind of desesperate because I really like biology/school. By changing my medication, I quietly went into mania. They, then, changed my medication again (which i'm on right now) and now i feel kinda desesperate, without energy. I sometimes get energy, on lucky moments. The only good thing is that I don't really feel bad that I changed my medication, because after I did I now understand that I was a little bit above the steady mood. And right now, like 2-3 weeks ago it was going good at school. Every grades were really going up. Because of this fuckin disease, it fucked up all the things AGAIN and I don't know if i'll be able to do something if my mood doesen't get steady really soon. Kinda F****************** sad because if it would be steady i'm certain I could access great programs at university like medecine. What my dream is all about ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcjimjam Posted May 2, 2017 Share Posted May 2, 2017 The worst part of this condition is failing to live up to my potential and spending 16 hours a day feeling bad about it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iceberg Posted May 2, 2017 Share Posted May 2, 2017 Gear- more and more they are going with Depakote or lamictal first...even though lithium is better 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoshugoddess Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 It seems as though, I am never "stabilized" for long. My meds have been changed so many times over the last 16 years, that I feel like some kind of guinea pig, or lab rat, that the psychiatrists like to experiment with. It sucks big time. Sometimes, I get so fed up, I want to drive out into a remote area, and scream for like 5 hours or so. Until I lose my voice. Yep, it definitely sucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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