I fucking hate how ugly I am.
I have naturally curly and wavy hair like that girl on Peanuts. It's really messy and whenever I try to comb it always goes back to the way it was as if I've never combed in the first place with 3 minutes. Everyone at school makes fun of me by calling me a "crackhead" and a homeless person because of my hairstyle.
I am also morbidly obese, weighing 237 pounds. I hate how fat I am and I used to wear jackets all the time even in the summer to try to hide my fat. I also try to hold my breath to be temporarily skinnier. I trying to lose weight but it's impossible as I don't have access to any gyms especially since I'm only 16 and I'm not really the well off type.
I also eat a shitton and I'm really impulsive about it. I'll try to commit to eating less and healthy but 5 seconds later I've downed a whole tub of ice cream and I've only realized it when it's too late and I feel guilt.
I've contemplated starving myself as a result to lose weight.
Is anyone else going through similar stuff? Anyone have any advice?
By Tia grainger
Soo, Iv been on seroquel XR for 3 years on 150mg, and recently about 2 month ago, I started drinking more and did some coke every couple days, so when I was doing coke I wouldn't take my meds cuz i didn't know how they would react to each other.
Did that for 2 month now I just got my refil and I'm gonna start taking them regularly again, and I took on last night after not taking on for 3 or 4 days, and I feel anxious still and sick to my stumach, but I'm really tired like more tired then when I was on it regularly.
I'm kinda concerned and i hope that it goes away, any advice would help.
Yes im aware this was a bad idea I realize that now which is why I'm going back to taking them regularly and not doing coke anymore.
So i have a female best friend, im a man and we are the best friends of all time, she really helped me trough my depression and addictions. There are no more than a friendship, we already talked about it and we date other people. The problem arise when my parents, very religious, start to say that i spend to much time whit her, but we really just do the normal friend things, she come to my home, we eat, we hang out, etc. We see everyday because of college.
It obsesses me that my parents annoy me whit their shit that i will end just having sex whit her, or that she just want that, we had the opportunity before and we choosed to not, and even if that happens cant just let me alone?.
Im all day thinking that they are against me, also they annoy me and its hell.
Can someone give me advice?
Thanks in advance.
All of a sudden, I have been depressed over the past couple days. For a while now I have been on a path of personal growth, and trying to improve my life by continuing to make gradual changes and be a more active participant in life. A lot of the positive changes have enriched my life greatly. One of the positive changes I made, was attempting to dump my crazy ex who has proven *impossible* to get rid of. (But that is another story for another thread.) To be honest, some days are difficult. I have been going through a lot of transitions. I recently had a milestone birthday (30), I have out grown a lot of the people in my life (who are actually pretty effed up individuals under the surface), and there has been serious strain on close relationships.
To try to help manage some of the stress I saw a healer for some energy work. Afterward, it seemed to help tremendously. For a solid month I was full of energy, taking excellent care of myself, and very productive. Cue two days ago, and the honeymoon phase is over. All of a sudden this silent depression started creeping in. On a surface level I feel that I have nothing to be terribly depressed about. On a deeper level, I know that my life is less than ideal. The difference, is that I am usually filled with a positive "can do" attitude about improving it. Of course, there is also the ever-present struggle with the illness which many of us can sometimes be in denial about.
So for whatever reason, it happened. I got depressed. Not-sad, melancholy, hopeless, overcome with emotion,-depressed. Just depressed. I think it started when I tried to do a positive thing for myself, at which I failed. About five days ago I attempted to finally quit nicotine gum for good. I quickly realized that this simply would not be possible for me at this time in my life.
Lately, I have little motivation to do anything. For about a week now, I have gone back to taking poor care of myself and eating poorly. Nothing sounds "inviting" to me when I think of fun things I could do. My emotions are dulled, yet on some level I feel this pesky throbbing ache coming from somewhere...Like as if I were getting hit with a hammer...in the heart.
I am writing this thread for no other reason than to just say that depression blows....the big one. And if you are reading this and you are depressed, you are not the only one.
I am going to fight it though. I am going to continue to do non-depressive things until my attitude follows my life style. In the meantime, it sucks trying to function when you are "running on empty" so to speak.
Is this common? 9 months ago, I was the EXACT same weight as now (weight doesn't really fluctuate), however, at that time, I was 2 sizes smaller, and my Bra size (hadn't changed from High School) suddenly shrunk a cup size, clothes were baggier, arms/stomach/butt were skinnier. Basically VERY skinny, but fit/healthy (no flab).
Now, I'm noticeably bigger, with stomach pooch (a donut is accumulating around my waist line) skinny jeans are now butt-squeeze too tight, upper inner thighs are rounder, bra size is back to the size it was.
My diet and activity level has been the same....! How is it possible, I could gain so much flab in 9 months, without the scale budging an ounce?? I've been maintaining my usual cardio, weight training and sculpt classes 3xper week at gym. Have I just lost muscle and gained twice as much fat or something? How can I tone/slim back down again? WTH happened to my shape?