Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

What do you want from this life? *trigger*


Recommended Posts

My therapist asked me this today, and I proceeded to breakdown.  My husband told me I was acting like a "cuntface" on Mother's Day.  I'm working 12 hour days, trying to catch up from my off days that I can't get out of bed because my anxiety is just debilitating.  I'm trying my best.  I don't understand why I just can't get this under control.  I'm getting knocked down while I'm up, drowning, with everyone screaming at me "learn how to swim."  I hate this feeling of hopelessness.  

Edited by Asha
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tell your husband, from me, that he has no right to speak to you that way. Ever. Don't make me come over there.

If you could-if any of us could-"just...get this under control" we wouldn't be bipolar. We would be totally different people, and the whole world would be different without us, and even when it feels as though that would be better, it isn't. You have every right to be you, to be supported and cherished just as you are. 

Have you been to your tdoc and pdoc lately? It sounds as if you need someone to talk to, and probably better meds. It stinks that it's so hard for you right now.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tell your husband to fuck off. wow. I can't believe he said that. The sad thing is, most people don't understand what it is like .. for them they may be able to handle it.. but for people with anxiety it effects us and our brains and bodies differently. You are not being hopeless! Be proud of what you are doing! Many people who struggle can't even do 1/4 of what you do. Don't listen to them.. they are non supportive and you don't need that added stress. Take Care. Thinking of you.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ugh.  All I can say about people who think they can justify demeaning someone else who has a mental illness because that person is having trouble functioning is this: ignorance is bliss!  Ignorance is no excuse for that kind of disrespectful language though.  I'm sorry.

Also, I am wondering what made your therapist ask you such a question.  I haven't been psychotic or bipolar for years but as to what do i want out of life, it is very hard for me to understand and articulate.  It's subject to change.  Logically I can say that I want to be happy and healthy.  As for where do I see myself in a decade or 20 years form now, I just don't know.  I'm not very ambitious and lack motivation.  Chances are things will not be very different for me no matter what age I am.  Its still a little too early for me to know that completely though.  

 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@Gearhead @KnickNak @TakeAChillPill @melissaw72

I spent all night last night looking up articles about bi polar disorder and relationships.  I sent all of the ones I could relate to, to my husband.  I think I'm just craving for some sort of emotional support.  I get that I'm edgy, and act shitty.  But I don't need a single person to entertain it.  I want to be left alone, but I also want the support and understanding with what I'm going through ?

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Asha said:

@Gearhead @KnickNak @TakeAChillPill @melissaw72

I spent all night last night looking up articles about bi polar disorder and relationships.  I sent all of the ones I could relate to, to my husband.  I think I'm just craving for some sort of emotional support.  I get that I'm edgy, and act shitty.  But I don't need a single person to entertain it.  I want to be left alone, but I also want the support and understanding with what I'm going through ?

Completely understandable.  I hope things start to change for you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 5/16/2017 at 7:53 PM, Asha said:

My therapist asked me this today, and I proceeded to breakdown.  My husband told me I was acting like a "cuntface" on Mother's Day.  I'm working 12 hour days, trying to catch up from my off days that I can't get out of bed because my anxiety is just debilitating.  I'm trying my best.  I don't understand why I just can't get this under control.  I'm getting knocked down while I'm up, drowning, with everyone screaming at me "learn how to swim."  I hate this feeling of hopelessness.  

That is totally unreasonable.  You work 12 hour days.  That is stressful for "normal" people.  What more does your husband expect?  Does he work 12 hour days?

"Cuntface?" Is he a child trying to make up edgy insults?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I also concur that your husband has absolutely no right to call you that. I furthermore concur that 12 hour days are stressful even for non-MI people; would your husband feel the same way if he had to work such hours?

I likewise wonder why your tdoc would ask you such a question; it implies that one should have some kind of future ambition, when oftentimes all one can do is deal with things now as they are.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Closure said:

I also concur that your husband has absolutely no right to call you that. I furthermore concur that 12 hour days are stressful even for non-MI people; would your husband feel the same way if he had to work such hours?

I likewise wonder why your tdoc would ask you such a question; it implies that one should have some kind of future ambition, when oftentimes all one can do is deal with things now as they are.

exactly.  At this point in my work there is nothing i can do.  Let me bills go?  I mean, that' an option.  Of course I have days where I am so optimistic, I can do it all, and then days where i don't even give a shit about anything. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oh my god that is sickening that he would talk to you like that :\ He is obviously the cunt face to talk that way to a woman, much less someone suffering from mental illness. If he wants you to feel better, he should support you and try to get you back on your feet! My girlfriend has very chronic depression and anxiety, we are always picking each other up to get back on our feet. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 5/16/2017 at 4:53 PM, Asha said:

My therapist asked me this today, and I proceeded to breakdown.  My husband told me I was acting like a "cuntface" on Mother's Day.  I'm working 12 hour days, trying to catch up from my off days that I can't get out of bed because my anxiety is just debilitating.  I'm trying my best.  I don't understand why I just can't get this under control.  I'm getting knocked down while I'm up, drowning, with everyone screaming at me "learn how to swim."  I hate this feeling of hopelessness.  

Your HUSBAND called you that?¿? On Mother's Day, no less? He's someone who is supposed to love, respect, and support you, not insult and belittle you. This does not bode well for the future. If he treats you like that, he does not deserve you. If the behavior persists, I would seriously consider divorce. I'm the product of a bad marriage, and let's just say it didn't end well.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...