is parental body checks some kind of abuse?

[allybea]

 I've had a history of self harm since seventh grade, and when my mom found out about it she used to do body checks. She used to make me show her mybody so she would know if ive hurt myself or not. The whole situation is very uncomfortable and made me feel 10x more insecure than i was.Although i know she was only doing it to protect and make sure i was okay,i was wondering if it was some kind of abuse or damaging when someone does that?

 

 

[Wooster]

Hi allybea.

I can appreciate that it feels very intrusive to be required to do "body checks". It clearly sounds like it was damaging to you, even though it likely would not be considered abuse.

I also am not sure of your age, but wanted to leave this here since you sound like you might be on the younger end of things.
 

 

[Geek]

Allybea, for the most part I don't think it matters if other people consider it abuse. It sounds intrusive and it may have done damage to you. Our parents aren't perfect and can hurt us even when (or perhaps especially when) they're doing the best they know how to keep us safe.

Whatever feelings you have about it and your mom are okay because they're yours. You might feel things like untrusted, violated, or unsafe. You might feel all those things and still love your mom. Feelings are complicated.