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hey my schizophrenia has been hell for the beginning of it but now its like its not even there like I know I still think kinda psychotic but not too psychotic like I'm only on 2 different med's and been getting them reduced and taken off for the past year or so takes so long because I only see my P doc every 2-3 months anyone wanna talk on how my schizophrenia is so good?

my P doc said's I'm in the 10 percent of people with schizophrenia who show no symptoms btw

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um, sure...i'm open to hearing your story.

 

you should be advised that this site is super "pro treatment" so while i'm interested in all experiences, all of our experiences aren't given equal respect and right to be told. i'm assuming you are or were diagnosed with schizophrenia? i am and i have tried many things, some obviously foolish ones and some that helped me at the time. i don't think i'm looking for advice, but i'd like to hear your story.

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while my first three years of schizophrenia were hell and yeah nonstop paranoia always thinking people are gonna set me up, while everyone told me no ones after you, which I later realized was true cause to be honest if people were really after me I would of been dead already, but using logic the only thing I had to fight schizophrenia I later realized everything was a delusion like everyone told me it was I later faced my fears and which would mean going outside and stuff, which later I would realize it wasn't real and I still had delusions but about other things and I would later talk myself into believing they weren't real like say if you think someone put in a chip in your head how did they do it anyways? like they would have to be aliens or something, out of this world cause there is no scars are anything and how is that possible, but if aliens real why would they do it to just you? whats so special about you that they would do it, notice how I'm figure things out slowly step by step first it was a "chip in my head" then it was "aliens that did it" then was "why would they chose me" and later "am I something special" then its logic after that just like that I destroy my delusions and it works by step by step till you find the logic that's not real and it works with anyone as long as you find logic

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Just now, PsychTheShizo said:

while my first three years of schizophrenia were hell and yeah nonstop paranoia always thinking people are gonna set me up while everyone told me no ones after you

which I later realized was true cause to be honest if people were really after me I would of been dead already

but using logic the only thing I had to fight schizophrenia I later realized everything was a delusion like everyone told me

it was I later faced my fears and which would mean going outside and stuff which later I would realize it wasn't real and I still had delusions but about other things and

I would later talk myself into believing they weren't real like say if you think someone put in a chip in your head how did they do it anyways?

like they would have to be aliens or something out of this world cause there is no scars are anything and how is that possible but if aliens real why would they do it to just you?

whats so special about you that they would do it notice how I'm figure things out slowly step by step first it was a "chip in my head" then it was "aliens that did it" then was "why would they chose me" and later "am I something special"

then its logic after that just like that I destroy my delusions and it works by step by step till you find the logic that's not real and it works with anyone as long as you find logic

sorry i needed to break that up to read it.

 

i hear you. i personally think i have some answers based on my own experiences as to what is in my head and why the wiring is invisible in the ways they've thus far looked for it.

 

but that's a separate story and not yours, which, by the way, i do thank you for sharing. much food for thought.

 

take care

melli x

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9 minutes ago, PsychTheShizo said:

I would like to hear them in fact shoot me a private message if you can cause I don't know how

i can't private message with you. maybe i'll find threads where i've posted about my situation.

i am leery of people i've just met; i have boundaries. so, i can't private message you and would prefer you not private message me at this time. i'm not well enough for that now and may never be. it is the way it is.

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I had a tdoc who focused on cbt. She Would use logic to chip away at my delusions. That sounds like what you are doing. That is great you have come so far. I have doubts about things they tell me were delusions, i just dont focus on them.

i am very fortunate and have responded well to the medication, which makes the therapy possible.

inam happy for you 

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@PsychTheShizo 

I am very similar. SchizoAffective w/psychosis. Various underlying personality issues.

Went through a 3 year phase of rapid onset and manifestation of symptoms, some very nasty stress-induced psychosis that nearly killed me. 3 inpatient hospital visits due to manic episodes. Several different medication cocktails.. threw my entire life in a dumpster. Lost everything that ever meant anything.

Started over. Completely. Made a ton of sacrifices and rebuilt my life. The symptoms dramatically faded as my levels of stress decreased. I still have many underlying symptoms, but they are now (questionably) manageable without medication. I still struggle with anxiety, bipolar cycles, and some delusional thinking, but.. nowhere near to the crippling extent of my madness 15 years ago.

I agree that the forum here is very pro-treatment. I fully support that approach. Treatment takes many forms. Although medication can certainly be credited with saving my life, the side effects became unbearable. Avoidance of triggers, a vow of simplicity, online interaction, and taking care of myself is my maintenance, therapy, and treatment.  

I willingly sacrifice everything that is overly stressful to me. I avoid people. I avoid relationships. I have a job with very minimal human interaction. Forums provide an outlet. This is the extent of my social exposure. Although I care very much, I establish boundaries and do not get emotionally attached to anybody or anything. I must suppress my feelings. For some, my solution is the exact definition of their illness? Such irony.

I changed everything since being diagnosed. Exercize. Diet. Sleep pattern. Workplace. Home. Sobriety. Perspective. Environment.

I research my illness relentlessly and keep track of how I am feeling, or what I am doing, looking for signs of regression. For peace of mind, I do have access to Ativan if I need to stop the noise. I have taken a couple in the last decade. 

I am very aware that my symptoms can take a turn for the worse at any time and would not hesitate to seek professional help and instantly hop back on the Medicoaster if the need arises. There have been a lot of advancements in the last decade. It's nice to have options. I do have a plan for the what-ifs. Although I know my approach is rather unique, it has worked well for me.

I also know that, in the realm of mental illness, I am extremely fortunate that my mind was not permanently damaged when it melted. It's a very cruel world that we live in. For that reason, I try to be as helpful and supportive as I can possibly be. 

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