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well i was firstly diagnosed as Bipolar 1 but i had 4 manic psychotic episode in the last episode there were something new i got tons of conversations in my head like i made some kind of dialogue i think its the anxiety but there were other stuff like i was the main charther of something and when i was communicating with people after they left i could think they are still present and continue the conversations in my head in the night sometime i saw the people like they were doubled and everytime i had conversation with people there were tons if associations. i was prescribed seroquel 500 and lithium 1200 but sometimes when im in a crowded area i still keep making those stupid conversations in my head and its bugging me like im not the same again. but i wasnt medicated well i took 100 seroquel and 900 lithium when it happened. i found those dialogue i made in my mind funny especially because it was with all the people i met across the world it was kinda funny in the beginning i was taking pictures with ladies and kissing their hands and simultanously having conversation in my head but i dont quite understand the conversation is it a a form of ocd anxiety or hallucination since i heard only people that i know and why u have to keep being treated i wasnt violent at all even at the hospital im non violent person only if im teased.  they gave me at the hospital this diagnosis Schizoeffctive Bipolar type and i was released with the seroquel 500 and lithium 1200. i dont wanna be treated.

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Well it's initially up to you unless it's court ordered and even then I guess it's up to you..I compare myself pre meds and it's way more scary than without..I'm in no means completely symptom free..some stuff just won't let go..but I'm better off with meds..so I hope you reconsider your options and choice

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10 hours ago, yonmor6 said:

what the point of taking treatment if it makes u crazy ive been better of treatment i think

i don't know your situation and it's difficult for me to read that long paragraph. but i can answer this question for myself.

the point is that without treatment i will either end up dead or doing something horrifying to myself. the only way i can effectively communicate with other people and participate in the world around me constructively is with treatment.

i wouldn't say that treatment makes me "crazy". how does it do so for you? what do you mean, is what i'm asking? i will say this: i've not a good judge of myself when i'm untreated. i always think i'm better off, but then i look at how destructive schizophrenia has been when untreated in my life and i'm not better off. it's part of the illness that it deceives me in that way.

i hope this helps you some.

best wishes. xx -melli

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15 hours ago, yonmor6 said:

what the point of taking treatment if it makes u crazy ive been better of treatment i think

I suppose I was less crazy thinking the North Korean government was personally out to get me and readying myself to hang in the woods to avoid capture and torture. Treatment is life and death for some of us.

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