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Depression lies, or... just the truth?


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I have thoughts which my tdoc, or others, tend to classify as "depressive", and I should not believe them. How many times have I heard it "don't believe it, it's the mental illness speaking", "it's one of the old records"....

But.... what if it's not?

I mean, the "I will never have the lifestyle I am used to (because my parents are wealthy), which means I'll have to give up on many things that have been part of my self-care for years (therapy,eating fancy food,...)". Are these things essential? No. But I am already miserable with all this to help make life less painful, so... how will I do? Because I won't have a "good" job like my parents. I can barely handle the stress of working in a bookstore... and I don't have any useful skill.

And... there was this one "dream" of what I wanted to do with my life (in terms of job), and... it's obvious I can't do it, and probably won't ever be able to do it, because it requires an emotional stability and resilience I don't have. So yeah.

What if there is really mostly misery in my future?

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I can't promise you that you will be able to support yourself like your parents have, but I can tell you that you can be happy in any circumstance as long as your basic needs are met. I wouldn't worry so much about it if I were you. Things will work out. The key is to get the help you need so that you get better. If you are well mentally, you can do a lot of what you want to do. For the moment, work on yourself. The rest will come.

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I think some of what you said is realistic. You may not be as wealthy as your parents or working in that one dream job for quite some time. They might be unattainable. But after that you make a big leap. There are more possible futures than the two you've listed. There are other jobs than you might find fulfilling. There are other self-care strategies that can replace the ones that you're used to. These things aren't immediate changes, but they are future possibilities that could be part of a life you enjoy.

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I have changed my vision and dream over the years. Actually, I had my dream job and guess what, it wasn't as perfect for me as I expected it to be, so I shifted my plans and found something that worked out much better in all ways.  I don't have my parents life but I'm not them and times are different so I don't even go there. I don't have what I thought I wanted but things are good since I got the depression under control. Do I regret not having the life I'd imagined?  Life doesn't necessarily go according to plan, I've learned, but it can still be good. It's possible to change your plans especially if you get the depression dealt with. I don't believe there is one and only perfect job, perfect mate, perfect home, etc. I think a lot of it is when you aren't depressed you can better see options to be happy in a wider range of situations. So I think things can be good for you, maybe in a situation you haven't envisioned yet. 

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