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Sigh. The thing that bothers me the most are my issues with feeling that everyone else around me is better than me at everything. Thus, I shouldn't even try...no matter what it is....with boys...or school...or work. I'm just not as good as other people. I don't know how to make this go away. How to deal with it.

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Sigh. The thing that bothers me the most are my issues with feeling that everyone else around me is better than me at everything. Thus, I shouldn't even try...no matter what it is....with boys...or school...or work. I'm just not as good as other people. I don't know how to make this go away. How to deal with it.

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Danica,

I really do know exactly how you feel and I am sorry that you have to feel the same way I do.  When the throughts are there and just eating at you, I know that it must get very hard to deal with. 

the reality of the world as a whole is that there is always going to be someone who might be better than you at something.... but even those people have thier own flaws.  im sure that you have your own special talents that maybe you just have not found yet.... I know that i m still looking and waiting... 

None of this means that you should stop trying.... god no.  you want to give up trying just because you might not be as "good" as some other people and that they are better than you?  Danica, perfection is overrated, truly.  You are your own amazing person who does not need to be defined by others.  It is your depression talking and making you think otherwise.....

Try not to compare yourself to others because you, as an individual, cannot be compared to anyone else.  you are your own amazing person.... just always remember that....

xo

~Ophelia~

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Danica,

When we are at our lowest point or just feeling depressed, we have a tendency to compare our insides to others outsides. But the trick is, they make not be feeling so great on the inside also. We all have masks we wear at times to get through certain situations. I like to keep that in mind when I feel that way and believe I am as good as they are and I deserve the best. Keep telling yourself this and you will come to believe it in time. Keep that chin up!!!

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Perfectionism is indeed way overrated. In the end, it's also paralyzing -- you never get anything done because you know from the start that it's not going to be "good enough" or "perfect enough. So why bother?

The reality is that we are all complex beings, we have strengths and weaknesses. We are better at some things than many other people and we are worse at some things than many other people.

I think the goal is to be the best I can at the things that matter most to me, and that 'best' is not equal to 'perfect.' Feeling like it had to be perfect on the first try has added years to how long I've spent working on some things. I knew it couldn't be 'perfect' so I didn't do anything, waiting for when I felt like I could do it that way. If I hadn't finally made myself start anyway, it still wouldn't be done.

So go forward! Learn! Live life to enjoy it, because trying to perfecting things doesn't lead to enjoyment.

Fiona

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Danica, perfection is overrated, truly.  You are your own amazing person who does not need to be defined by others.  It is your depression talking and making you think otherwise.....

AMEN!  That was a beautifully intelligent statement!  Perfection is OVERRATED and aiming for perfection defined by others will destroy you.  It took me a very long time to discover this and I found that what was driving me to perfection and failure was the feelings of inadequacy that I felt coming from my mother.  I realized that her criticisms were probably caused by her own low self-esteem and depression. 

Don't let others drag you down sweetie, we do enough of that all on our own.  You are a PERFECT person in your own way, we all are.  I know it's so hard to climb out of that mind-set, but take baby steps if you can.  Try something new that makes you feel great, regardless of how good you are at it.  I'm sure there are things you are really great at, but you don't realize it because you spend too much time focusing on the things you're not so great at.  We're all our own worst critic. 

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