Motoko Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 So I recently went off antipsychotics after having been on them for nearly seven years. They weren't helping with what I needed the most help with and I (and my shrink) suspected they were responsible for the anhedo'nic malaise I've been suffering from for years now. At first I was resistant to get off them because I really thought I needed them, but then I ran out and didn't get it refilled for a couple of weeks and was like, "Hey, I don't feel DEAD inside." And I wasn't suffering any bad effects from NOT taking them, so I figured I would just take them on as as-needed basis. Which happens about once every two weeks. I just get hamster wheel brain and have to shut it off. And so far that's been working out really well. I'm curious how long it's taken for others who have gotten off them to get them out of your system. I haven't taken any Haldol in over a month, but it was just in the last few days that I really felt like I'd "woken up". I can write again. I haven't written anything other than cryptic Facebook posts since 2014. I've done nothing but read Facebook and the news and watch tv and movies since I quit my job four years ago, which I had to do because I couldn't function at it anymore. I was constantly forgetting things and fucking up, it was awful. Looking back I can't be sure if it's because of the illness or the meds. I don't really care anymore. I'm awake again. Thankfully my bipolar disorder isn't so severe that I need APs all the time anymore. I think at first I did, but I've changed a lot over the last several years since I was diagnosed. I don't have the same issues as I once did. I'm a lot more stable. I still take my other meds, mostly so I can sleep, since I also have a sleep disorder (a manageable one, thank the gods). The meds kept me from doing the thing that was probably the healthiest thing I was doing for myself: meditating. Now that I can focus and concentrate again, I can get back to a sitting practice, which gives me the mindfulness I need to stay on top of the little cues my brain gives me when I might be about to do something...off. It's nice not to be swimming in glue anymore. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
koa Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 (edited) This is tricky... I had a similar situation occur when I was on Latuda... my insurance suddenly stopped covering Latuda and my doctor had suggested that I could use samples and take them PRN/as needed, which I've done a few times since then, mainly becuse I'd not had a lot of symptoms in the preceding five years. I've e-mailed my pdoc to let her know whenever i was having more symptoms, scheduled a sooner appointment, and taken prn meds each time.... Having said this I want to emphasize that this was with a doctor's blessing/encouragement... I have yanked myself off meds on my own at a time when I was unstable and definitely regretted it after ending up hospitalized again. As well, some meds have pretty bad side effects if they're not tapered off of. I think it would definitely be a good idea to contact your doctor about what you're doing and take their advice. I would also say that taking PRN meds also requires a lot of insight about the triggers or warning signs of your symptoms and a lot of other coping skills, often... and that some illnesses have a lack of insight as a distinguishing character of the illness itself, which can make taking prn meds pretty hard! I will definitely be quick to start taking my Latuda or Risperdal again if I need to... much preferable than having a psychosis and being back in the hospital! Meditation/mindfulness is a great coping skill and the more of those you put into practice, the less pressure is left for the meds to do all the work... I know also working consistently with a counselor has helped me a lot in the process of recovery. Edited January 4, 2018 by koa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrianOCD Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 If you're feeling good then hooray! I just want to offer a warning to you though, I've gone through this too. I'm not bipolar, but I went down off Effexor and felt better for a year or so. Felt like I didn't need the stuff...Then slowly but surely my anxiety and neuroticism crept in. At first I had trouble eating, then trouble sleeping, and so on...Then I finally had a panic attack, and suicidal thoughts. Just be careful how fast you go down off of meds, and look out for warning signs. That will be my last time off meds ever, I can't go through another depression like that. I will take some form of chemical to the day I die. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blahblah Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 (edited) @Motoko Congrats, I am happy for you that you are feeling good. This is a very pertinent issue for alot of us here i think! There is a fine line between meds adding stability/benefit/improving quality of life, and meds adding side effects that bring on more problems. It's a difficult balance to figure out if a med is definitely "working" and you should stay on something for life, OR if a PRN for acute episodes is enough to manage one's symptoms in order to mitigate the longterm unwanted side effects. I agree with @BrianOCD - I had the same experience in the past, was on Cymbalta for 2-3 years, I was in a apathetic slump, not feeling really "good", getting really depressed about the sexual side effects, wondering if it was helping me at all, and I tapered off. After the nasty withdrawals were over, I did really well for 9 months, then had a slip up which quickly snowballed into an episode of insomnia, anxiety, paranoia, severe depression, etc. You also need to be careful if you stop a medication and then attempt to reinstate it at a later date, it may not work! I think this is called the "Kindling" effect. Something to consider.... Edited January 10, 2018 by Blahblah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts