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Hello All-

You all know my love life sucks. Since my most recent and intense partner left me, I hooked up with a friend. We were really attracted to each other and thought we could give it a go- then afterwards, he claimed he felt guilty and WANTED TO GET CLOSER TO GOD. I don't want to offend anyone, so please forgive me, but will Jesus have sex with him? Why is a relationship bad for religion?>! Don't answer that. I'm just pondering...

...then I had another encounter. This was with a guy I met AT THE PDOC'S OFFICE. Like I could expect him to NOT have issues. DUH. So it was amazing, for like 2 weeks, until he claimed that he WANTED TO GET CLOSER TO GOD and needed to not be in a sexual relationship wtih me anymore.

Am I sending all these guys to God?! What the heck? I've decided to avoid hooking up until after at least a month of dating, instead of following my intense passions and just taking him when I want to.

But I feel so bad, so unloved, so discarded...like my passion drove them away. Maybe it healed them so they could find religion again? As a Wiccan I'd like to believe in the positive...

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Am I sending all these guys to God?! What the heck? I've decided to avoid hooking up until after at least a month of dating, instead of following my intense passions and just taking him when I want to.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's probably a good idea (like I would know)

But I feel so bad, so unloved, so discarded...like my passion drove them away. Maybe it healed them so they could find religion again? As a Wiccan I'd like to believe in the positive...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

When it takes a deity to satisfy a guy after being with you ...

Seriously, maybe part of these guys' charm for you was their insecurity and

they quickly found out they weren't ready to handle an equal partnership with

a grown woman.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hawkeye- we are free to be passionate lovers! let's have at it baby!  ;)

Karuna- this is true. there are such cycles in life. wicca celebrates the cycles of the year with the mythology of the goddess and god.

But in retrospect, it is so funny that I keep turning people to G_D. I'm too much for them! Oh, a woman who likes to show her emotions! Who actually gets into sex! Damn, can't have that! lol

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Yeah, I wouldn't fret too much, Loon.  We all have our unconscious "types."  Yours just happens to be Jesus Hearts Me guys who can't handle unbridled passion. 

Think of it this way...  When you find Mr. Unbridled Passion, the sex will be 10000x better than Mr. I Need God Because I Can't Handle Your HotSexiness.

I will light a red candle for you.

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Loon ===== I'M YOURS! ;)

Damn if we lived closer I have no doubts that you'd have a silly grin on your face for months! Oh Loon, come over and lets get lost in mad passion.

Sometimes I think us MI folks tend to see into others differently then more 'normal' people do. It's like we have been there and know what to look for. I know I am more attracted to gals who are a tad bit wacko then the normal boring shit.

Problem is that there are a lot of wackos walking around worse then us and they don't even know it.  I can be crazier then Batshit but I am not stupid. I know my path in life is not easy, never has been and never will be. I have never been in the 'right' place at the right time. I  also know that the BP in my life has caused problems, but crap I'll make the best of it.

I hate the fact that over the years I have become rather jaded in my views of others. I don't trust women anymore. If only everyone could be honest and up front it would make life a lot easier. So many have their agendas hidden; games and more games. Crap I am so tired of the games.

What I do now when I met a gal is try to get as much out of her about her views, attitudes and feelings as I can on that first date. If I don't have a 100% warm'n'fuzzy feeling then I am not going to waste more time. I'd rather sit home and watch Discovery/History, etc then get burned again. I just don't have the capacity to lose more of my heart again.

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hawkeye=AWESOME!

Yep, I'm a bit jaded on the romance front. All these I Love Jesus guys who can't handle me are driving me Batshit. I get to thinking all is cool, and then BOOM, I Love Jesus strikes and all is lost! Or never found in the first place...

I'd rather be at home with this Hitler, I mean History Channel than with some loser.

I think they just felt inferior in bed and decided to go find someone who doesn't know what she's doing!!! LOL  ;)

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Loon- I think that you might have hit on something- the sex part. I know that my typical session is well over an hour of passion. Lots of caressing, kissing and good old fashioned fucking. I have found that so many gals have never had this level of passion in their lives, never had someone that wanted to please them first. And me thinks that it scares some away. It's like your fantasy come true. Sometimes we aren't able to handle that fantasy and then we go on sensory overload.

So, here is the gospel according to Hawkeye, one seriously horney old dude:

Live and love, drink and be merry. Fuck like there is no tomorrow. Fuck the rest of the wrold that can't keep up. Give what you can and don't expect others to measure up to your levels.

Loon, maybe I need to take a road trip to the arm pit of America! ;)

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hawkeye is so bad! LOL

yes, there is no moment like the NOW. not to have expectations of others, to just feel whatever is going on and tomorrow you'll be sober- from feelings and from whatever drinks were involved  ;)

I agree- guys haven't had that experience either. I call them Minute Men. They're ready and set and gone in less time than it takes for me to get undressed :) hey, what the heck?

hawkeye has a good point- what does it matter if they decide to join the Mormons after our evening of desire? (no offense to any people of any faith). that is their business, not mine. nothing to do with me, except of course that they are intimidated by my indoor sports talent!

loon

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Yessireee I'm BAAAADDDDD...  ;)

Sex can be a huge intimidator with some. For us BP's it is just a normal release. God it feels good! Sex is fun.

But for so many, one has to remember that they are stuck in an attitude of almost purtanical moralities. We are told not to touch that, not to play with that not to look at that(those). We are not taught how to have a GOOD sex life, but rather no instruction at all. Being initmate is the ulitmate in dropping your barriers. It's really hard to lie when one is butt ass naked. A lot of people won't or can't drop those barriers, thus the crappy sex.

Intimacy is about sharing an experience. SHARING is the key operative word. The last woman that I loved, I used to look deeply into her eyes when I was on top. I'd get lost in them. What mattered most to me was her pleasures and satisfaction. Mine came from hers.

What I am so tired of are the games that it seems that gals I meet want to play. I mean crap, you know you might want to fuck my brains out now, but you can't seem to be able to tell me that? Are you afraid of rejection? Instead of playing the game, lets discuss it. Just tell me what your thinking. I can't read your mind!

Crap I have been in a sour mood of late.

 

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I have met exactly 1 person who can keep up to me in the bedroom.  And I don't mean that in a "Yeah, I'm so cool!" sort of way.  Everyone else seems so... conservative.

I'm a freak.  AND IT'S NOT A SECRET!!!!!!!!!!  Who likes the occassional romantic liason.

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I think this is true, that these guys keep going to the religion EXCUSE because they're afraid of all that real intimacy entails. All of you have talked about what real intimacy entails. We drop barriers, try new things, love each others' pleasure, share and share alike. And we tend to be very expressive people too, and it makes people feel intimidated.

oh, the life. the bitterness that most of America can't share our experiences. the bitterness of attempting to find those who can! And it is an EXCUSE that they want to go to religion. it is just an excuse. it isn't ME per say.

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I often worry that I can't be that sweet wide eyed innocent that (especially) men want.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well, here is at least one man that doesn't necessarily want that and I am pretty sure there are a lot more that share my feelings on the matter.

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I think this is true, that these guys keep going to the religion EXCUSE because they're afraid of all that real intimacy entails. All of you have talked about what real intimacy entails. We drop barriers, try new things, love each others' pleasure, share and share alike. And we tend to be very expressive people too, and it makes people feel intimidated.

oh, the life. the bitterness that most of America can't share our experiences. the bitterness of attempting to find those who can! And it is an EXCUSE that they want to go to religion. it is just an excuse. it isn't ME per say.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

i agree.  i think im afraid of intimicy because im depressed and feel like my life is a disappointment during a good part of my average day... so i expect everyone to be disappointed in me, no matter how hard i try (and ive gotten much much better).  so my half-assed attempts are obviously a prelude to my misery. to cope with life i just go about in an ADHD daze and try to stay busy.  always showing up to things late and apologizing for the things i dont mean to do.  ;)   i have been dysthymic since like 14 with some bouts of hypomania.  sometimes i have genuine moments of life when im not miserable, and some cool people like to stick around with me in spite of me (many who are dealing with their depression issues too).

anyways i try to do my best but i really suck.  my feeling is that this citing religion sucks too.  people should be sharing exactly how they feel instead of using excuses.  pisses me off and its a waste of time..  theres gotta be some cooler people out there!

and you'd be surprised what a lot of men like in women, despite the general majority population of losers and their stereotypes.

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You're right on that Z...one guy I dated (had 2 dates- he scared ME) said he likes girls who abuse themselves, like with Ana, or SI, or something bad to themselves, because it is dark. Huh??!! I'm afraid!

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  • 2 weeks later...

When I look back, I've had better luck with Jewish partners, as it happens. Maybe a more rounded perspective. If you're not the dominant sect, you may have to think things out a bit more. And to tell the truth, I'm not talking about people who are seriously religious either.

Other thing is to find someone slightly ADDish. You'll (almost) always know what they're thinking. And, in my case, they'll be more tolerant of my own ADDishness. Plus, that impulsive stuff can be kinda fun on certain occasions, as long as someone has remembered the precautions.

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Update!

One of the monestary-goers hooked up with me again last night. I guess his stay at the old monestary wasn't so great after all. I don't know how often I'll have him in my bed, but at least he was honest about his lusty feelings. I guess his heart is healing (he was in the loony bin for 2 months after a bad breakup) and he is getting over Boundary Issues.

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Uh oh.

Now I'm remembering that wacky situation where I wanted a girlfriend and this girl who was 50% conventionally religious and serious about it, and 50% approximately the oppposite, who lusted after me 50% of the time. What a painful mess. Anyone else ever been kicked out of bed at 3AM, and not for anything you actually did. Did she really think her roomates wouldn't know unless I showed up at breakfast?

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