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I wouldn't worry too much about it.

Most anyone that would be worth marrying would be able to look past it and see the person inside.

That's all that matters. If someone can't do that, they're prolly not worth your time.

(Now if I had enough sense to listen to some of the few sensible things I say instead of the crazy stuff.) ;)

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Hi. Well, I got one thing right in my life; I picked the right woman. I probably was but didn't know I was bipolar when we met 8 years ago. We are happily married 5 years now. If it weren't for her well, I just don't know. She is the reason I struggle through and stay off drugs. I  make damn sure that she never regrets being with me. I guess making her happy is my driving purpose. If you're not ready then WAIT! Falling in love is easy. Finding someone with whom you have no reservations can take a lifetime. When you're ready, I guess you should bring up being BP early and explain what they're in for so they can back out. I know how corny this sounds and you probably hate hearing it..there is someone out there for you who you can make happy. I didn't believe that for 28 years. (Got my first date at 26-talk about patient!)

good luck

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My husband and I just celebrated our first anniversary.  We had lived together for a year prior to that, and sustained a 650 mile long distance relationship for a year prior to that.  So, we've been together for a total of three years.

I told him I was bipolar about 3 weeks after we met.  We actually met when I was still out on disability getting myself squared away after my initial diagnosis.  I was still fighting with the ugly side effects of too much topamax, and couldn't work in my profession (nursing) because of memory problems.  He thought I was cool anyhow ;)

He's extremely supportive, and we have a wonderful relationship.  This is my third marriage, and I never thought I'd do this again, and wasn't looking to.  He's my best friend, and a man who can make lemons into lemonade.

He's a keeper :)

Hang in there.  They show up when you least expect it.

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Jbelle-

I hear you! My boyfriend of over a year, who swore we were going to be together forever, just broke up with me because he's #1- having a mid-life crisis (he's older than me), and #2- he doesn't know if he can "handle being with a bipolar person".

However....

I've also had other boyfriends, and my ex-husband, who loved me BECAUSE I am a bit off. "Normal" people just do NOT have the capacity we do- to love as deeply, feel as creatively, be as wonderfully OFF as we are. The people worth having are people who will be attracted to our zany and different ways.

Usually it is no problem for an outgoing bipolar person to find many potential suitors. I have many, many potential suitors. The problem for me is having too many to choose from. Even the shy bipolar people will find that they attract attention because they are different in a good way ;) and if they are open to it and do not run, will find they also have suitors hanging all over them. I've seen it happen many a time.

So, yes, there are LOSERS AND SCUM in the world who are afraid of us and our "disorder". There are others who appreciate our freshness and constant fluxuations, our creativity and our dreamy flights of ambition. Who needs to be constant anyway? We're always changing. Someone worth your time will want to be along for the ride!

yours--- loon

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Oh yeah, you asked about our experiences with good relationships. I just got out of one, the only one I've ever had in fact, where the LOSER couldn't handle my intensity and used my disorder as an excuse. More like he has men-o-pause and cannot be with a woman for longer than a year...

Anyway...

As I said, I have no shortage of opportunities. No bragging, it is actually a problem sometimes. I was with my ex husband (I"m 27) for 6 years and while my bipolarity made it hard sometimes, especially during my first hospitalization (very overdue), he adored my originality and humor.

If there is anything to fear about finding men and being bipolar, it is either that you will find too many ;) , or that they will honestly not be able to handle your intensity and may need a milder chick. If that is the case, they would bore you to tears, and you'd eat them alive. You need someone who can match you and take it.

You'll find him, or many of them, I know you will!

loon

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I worry non-stop that no man will ever want to marry a woman with bipolar disorder.

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If it helps, I would and if I ever do, she will probably be bipolar.

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See, Synthetic agrees, BP chicks rule! Yeah, and BP guys often ARE attracted to BP women, because we match each other and don't eat each other alive.

You'll find Mr. Dreamboat. I've met a few boyfriends at the pdoc's office...lol...

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DH and i have been together for nearly 5 years and married for 2.  Happily.  He's a pyschology major, so he's very understanding about the psychoshit i go through.  But he's also my best friend and fully realizes i am not the BP.

Chin up.  ;) You can find it if you want it.

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