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You have got to love your self.


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I think there are very very few people who *want* to dislike them selves.  But it is difficult, as you should know, to feel empowered without a good base- when you feel like crap, because your brain got the chemical mix a little 'off'.

So from now on, I want to see you guys being more positive about yourselves.

Trust me, self-love is the secret of happiness (for most people).

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I'm going to say that I do appreciate the sentiment.

But this strikes a nerve with me.  I come here to get away from crap phrases just like this. 

I DO think attitude has a great effect on your treatment- but I honestly don't think it is the greatest factor. Not in properly  diagnosed affective disorders.

It's just that...

I walked out on counselors before because of the tendency to provide only 'coping skills' in replacement of therapy.

Positive thinking is a coping skill, which is useful, but not an effective treatment.

And what this feels like to me is ''think your way out of it.''

In your darkest depression, I wonder what your reaction would be to your own post.

Maybe I am just having a particularly dark day today.

...

and I look at what I just wrote.

and I look at my avatar.

and I want to cry.

It doesn't have anything to do with anyone on this thread, though. I was probably just right about the dark day.

But, it just sort of illustrates what I mean in that today is *not* really much worse than any other day [other than I am tired].  I am not drastically different, I think.  I just shows me how much I work my ass off at NOT giving in every day and running off into the woods. I can't be the only one.

TaDa!

My time in the Confessional Booth is served.

Probably why stuff like that pisses me off. 

And I really do take it personally. And I'm sure other people do too.

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Without trying to start anything, I really feel compelled to speak up here.

Although I'm ecstatic for Username that he's made strides in fighting his depression, I think some caution is advised here.

Many of us cannot do it on our own, and I think we need to keep in mind that that's okay.

It would be very easy for some of us to spiral even farther downward, thinking to ourselves "See, that person can do it on their own. Why can't I? I'm weak, I'm worthless." Especially with something as contiversial (sp?) as NLP, the likelyhood is that failure would be the result, and that's not going to help anyone feel better about themselves.

By all means we should be focusing on helping ourselves. But sometimes the only way we can do so is with the help and support of medication and a good, licensed psychotherapist.

The monsters we deal with are too big, too bad, and too scary to feel bad about not being able to defeat them alone.

For myself, I don't think I need to be happy to be successful. I think happy may be beyond me. I'd be satisfied with stable. Right now I'm satisfied with alive.

InfoNut

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Right now I'm satisfied with alive.

InfoNut

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AMEN!

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Alive is good...possibilities exist, loving anything or anyone, including one's self, included.

Depression is a soul sucking monster. Concepts of self-love, improving self-esteem, all that feel good stuff is esoteric when you can't get out of the clothes you put on 5 days ago and into the shower. IMO.

S9

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*nods*

existing has sometimes been a severe effort for me.

I have only come as far as I have today through going through the shadows in my psyche (and I'm still going...) and being steadily and stably loved and cared about by another (In my case, my therapist).

A healthy relationship with self, imo, is formed through healthy and nurturing relationships with others.

As Jung said, enlightenment (read recovery from depression) doesn't happen by imagining streams of light, but by making the darkness conscious. (and being safely contained in that process)

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I think I might understand what you are getting at.  It seems like you're sort of talking about not resting on your laurels by just having the depressive episodes held at bay by meds, but at working at building a more solid foundation for the future by working on your self-esteem and such.  You're perhaps aiming this more at the people whose serious depression is in remission, but you confused people with your wording, making it sound like you treat all serious depression through self-help.  Am I on track at all here?

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my depression IS organic.  i kept falling into the pit of hell during a period in my life where i otherwise was happy, engaged, challenged, interested, all that good stuff....but it didn't stop a little voice in my head from saying 'everyone hates you'  'no one likes you'.  i've since learned those are called intrusive thoughts, and no amount of self esteem is going to stop some god damn neuron from firing out of turn and putting those thoughts into my head.

Prozac stopped them.

i have to tell you, self esteem is not my problem.  i tend to be one of the most self content people i've ever met. i like me.  seriously. 

but damn, there are some wonky neurochemicals in my brain.  now i supplement with flax seed oil & it has kicked the dysthymia in the butt, and made a serious dent in the PMS.  obviously, my body needs some EFAs to go along with the Prozac.

give up my pills? never.  they kept me from slitting my wrists.  they stopped the thoughts.  they stopped the grayness from coming down....i could physically feel a depression coming, the lighting in the room would dim & colors would change.  that's not self esteem problems.  that's brain chemistry.

take away my pills over my cold dead body because that is what you will have if you do.

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Self esteem is good, but it's not the whole story, and sometimes you can't get there without meds, therapy, and whatever other help you need. My s.o. appears to like herself pretty well, except on the rare days when the meds aren't enough and she falls into the pit for a few hours.

I've noticed myself that some behaviors I struggled to change improved just about automatically when I took Prozac. (Like being able to make certain small appreciative noises on certain occasions, or being inclined to clean the kitchen floor...)

Now, where's the drug that makes you enjoy looking for work and want to do it 50 hours a week until you get big dough?

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The trick is to find something you love to do and get people to pay you for it.  I love to sing.  Ergo, my goal in life is to fine people who will pay me to sing.

Now, if I could only find someone who will pay me to sleep...

~CS

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