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So, I guess this post is about how I can deal with this issue...My SO is on his iPhone 24/7, even while walking down the street, eating meals with me, and when we are watching TV or a film at home. I cannot get him to get off it! I look over his shoulder and its crap (not important stuff), like stupid memes, Twitter feed, sports scores.

I've told him constantly that it really irritates me and makes me feel like I do not matter. I feel ignored. Yet he keeps going back on it. What else can I do??? Then I start going on my iPhone too, and this gets me depressed. I try to go out, and keep myself occupied away from him, but then when we're together he's non-stop digitally connected.

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2 hours ago, Blahblah said:

 I've told him constantly that it really irritates me and makes me feel like I do not matter. I feel ignored. Yet he keeps going back on it. What else can I do??? 

If you've told him it bothers you and makes you feel ignored, and he still continues to do it, it's highly possible that he's addicted to his phone......Cell phone addiction is becoming a growing problem.

In fact, there is now actually a name for cell phone addiction--Nomophobia:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/reading-between-the-headlines/201307/smartphone-addiction

 Have you tried to set any boundaries about cell phone use?......Such as, both of your cell phones will be turned off during mealtimes together?.......If he refuses to set any boundaries with his cell phone use, he might need professional help.

Would he be willing to go to counseling with you about this?........He needs to recognize that his behavior with the cell phone is a real problem.

Edited by CrazyRedhead
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My sister is a 'Phubber', not to the extent it sounds like your SO is doing but its really annoying, frustrating and you feel like the phone and facebook is more important. Now if she's looking at her phone and also trying to talk to me at the same time or missing half of what is being said to her as she's looking down at her phone I just walk off. If she can't look at me when talking and put the phone down I refused to engage with her. She's beginning to see what its like to be ignored when I do that but I really feel like she is obsessed with her phone. 

Maybe as he is not listening when you talk to him send it via email or a text so he not only has a saved copy it will be in the form of something he is putting all his attention into, and maybe try and get your him either some help or a few sessions of couples counselling so there is a third party helping to mediate the situation and show him just how much this is effecting you.

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5 hours ago, CrazyRedhead said:

If you've told him it bothers you and makes you feel ignored, and he still continues to do it, it's highly possible that he's addicted to his phone......Cell phone addiction is becoming a growing problem.

In fact, there is now actually a name for cell phone addiction--Nomophobia:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/reading-between-the-headlines/201307/smartphone-addiction

 Have you tried to set any boundaries about cell phone use?......Such as, both of your cell phones will be turned off during mealtimes together?.......If he refuses to set any boundaries with his cell phone use, he might need professional help.

Would he be willing to go to counseling with you about this?........He needs to recognize that his behavior with the cell phone is a real problem.

I believe it! I know they are having a tough time dealing with kids that are screen addicted....He is not even on facebook, but his constant phone checking has become worse in the last year. I've asked him to turn it off, during dinner which a few times he did, but then he just goes back to the same behavior the next day or the rest of the evening.

We have been through marital counseling and it hasn't helped the issues. I don't think I could get him to start going to more sessions anytime soon, I had to drag him to the ones that we attended, and the counselor didn't even act like this was a problem :-(

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"In the latest study on the subject, phubbing was found to threaten four “fundamental needs” — belongingness, self-esteem, meaningful existence and control — by making phubbed people feel excluded and ostracized. That may be particularly harmful because phubbing happens all the time, the researchers say.

Other research has shown that phubbing can affect relationships. Two separate recent studies found that when spouses phub each other, they’re more likely to experience depression and lower marital satisfaction. “If your life partner is on the phone, that means that they are prioritising something else over you in those moments of togetherness,” and that hurts, says Seppälä, who was not involved with the research.

There are a lot of articles and research online about this. Maybe you could get him to read some, and post some to the therapist at the same time!

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