So, I was extremely depressed in January after tapering off all my meds on my own (stupid). My doctor put me back on Wellbutrin, and we decided to try Prozac as an SSRI. The Prozac wasn't kicking in and I learned about the GeneSight genetic test for antidepressants. I asked for and had the task done. They never sent me a copy of the results.
After a month on the Prozac and no help, I also asked to go up from 300mg Wellbutrin XL to 450mg, and that seemed to help. I had an appointment mid-April and was mostly feeling better. He decided to keep me where I was at. I forgot to ask about the GeneSight results.
I generally feel good during the week but am miserable on the weekends. I generally lay in bed all day feeling depressed, binge eat, try and sleep as much as possible. I don't know if this is something that can be fixed with medication or if it is purely behavioral. My therapist suggests making plans for the weekend ahead of time and trying to make my weekends structured.
I finally got around to sending the doc a message on the patient portal asking about the GeneSight results. He responded that the report showed all my meds were good for me except Prozac. The test recommends Lexapro or Zoloft instead. He did not say anything about changing the Prozac.
For three days I have been trying to make an appointment to see the doctor. If I call I'm on hold for 10 minutes before leaving a message. I've also tried requesting an appointment with the patient portal. Nothing. So, I'm thinking about just messaging the doc (since I know he responds) and mention the problems I'm having on the weekends as well as concerns I have about staying on Prozac. I want to know if I should switch, or if I should just stay where I'm at since I'm basically doing good except no motivation and very depressed on the weekends.
What do you all think I should do? Ask the doctor online about switching, keep trying to make an appointment, or just try and add structure to the weekends and see if I can get by without a med change?
Current meds (all generic):
Wellburtrin XL: 450mg
hydroxyzine: 25mg 3x daily P.R.N.
So about 5pm every day of late, my mood just turns black. I can't buy a neutral (forget positive) cognition or emotion, I start to feel and think very negatively no matter what I do. Of course, I'm feeling and thinking badly beforehand, but it just sinks to another level, or depth if you will.
So I'm wondering if it's a med (or meds) that I'm taking that's losing effect around 5pm. I take the following meds - yes, it's a crazy-looking brew I know, but it allows me to function somewhat - at 6am (in milligrams):
200 Provigil, 2.5 Abilify, 40 Fetzima, 30 Lexapro, 15 BuSpar, 150 Lyrica, 10 Percocet and these at 2pm:
150 Lyrica, 15 BuSpar and these 4 times a day, where the last dose is typically 2pm:
15 Adderall 10 Percocet (for chronic pain) and these at 7pm for sleep:
150 Trazodone, 50 Benedryl It's impossible to confidently predict a "culprit" but if anyone has any hunches, I'd love to hear them.
For example, today I'm splitting (some of) the 6am batch into two and taking the second half at 2pm as an experiment. I feel that empirical experimentation might be the way to go because the theory is too complex with this many psychotropic medications in play.
Cheers , Pete
I've been on trazodone (desyrel/molipaxin) for almost a year now. I take a low dose, 50 mg, and I also take 100 mg lamotrigine.Initially it worked fantastic. However, after about six months, my depression started to come back, up to the point where I feel really bad most of the time. At least I still manage to go to work, and do my work properly.
But it feels like all the negative things in my life are weighing me down, to the point where it is consuming me, as if it is a constant presence in my chest. We are going through a difficult time in my country, droughts and heat waves, political clashes and riots, bad exchange rates, we're about to have food shortages etc., and I have a lot lf stress in my personal life as well, but it shouldn't affect one so much, right? To the point of thinking only about it? I'm also feeling really anxious at work, but at least it's not on anxiety attack level yet. At night I take xanax/xanor to cope.
So what I want to know is - is it my meds that are not working properly anymore, or is it just a rough patch? Will it pass? And what can I do to make it pass? I'm too tired to exercise, but I really want to...
Changing meds is really a big thing for me. So I don't want to do it unnecessarily. Maybe an increase in the trazodone eill help? Any advice from someone who has been in a similar position?
Well.... I found this site by searching "self harm kits", I just wanted to know what other people did, if it was common for people to carry around supplies with them or whatever.
So now I'm here, reading about other people and their struggles. Relating and not relating, though still understanding.
I think that maybe if I have an actual place to talk, a real place that I can have feedback on, then maybe I'll be able to resist hurting myself.
Okay so actual info part:
My name is Shane. I'm listed as agender on here but a more accurate term would be agender/transmasculine. I use He/Him pronouns but they/them is also okay.
I'm 19, I'll be turning 20 in December. I've been dealing with self harm problems and MI for almost 8 years now. I'm also trans so that doesn't exactly help me in any way...
Anyways, from the beginning now. In 6th grade I became friends with someone who is my best friend. At the time, he was self harming and I guess that's where I had gotten the idea to do it to myself but I don't blame him or anything, it's not his fault that I started to do the same thing. Though not as intense as him, he was actually cutting and giving himself eraser burns, I was doing no-bleed scratches with a bent paperclip. At the time, I didn't really understand why it helped, but it did.
Sometime in junior high I tried to tell my mother that I was depressed and had been for a few years. I had scoured websites, taken quizzes, doubted I was mentally ill, retook quizzes, looked up symptoms. Everything was the same. I was depressed and I didn't want to feel this way. So I tried to tell my mom, she didn't think the same thing. She didn't think I had any reason to be depressed. Which of course made me feel worse because I knew there was no emotional/situational reason for me to be depressed, I just was and I couldn't stop it.
So I continued to self harm. There were a few times when my mom had confronted me about the scratches on my arm and even a time when I had a huge bleeding scratch down my arm. (all in 8th grade). It wasn't until 11th grade that my mom actually took me in to see a doctor. I had to check off a list to see if I was actually depressed and I was prescribed medication (Fluoxetine and Xanax), it helped but not for long. Eventually it stopped working, so I stopped taking it (I know, I know).
I again tried to tell my mom that the meds weren't working anymore. She just thought I wasn't taking them, of course I wasn't but they weren't working long before that.
This last February (2015), I didn't quite try to kill myself. I was in college by then (second semester). I was in a campus library, downstairs, in an area I knew people didn't walk around a lot. I found myself a spot and had decided to take the bottle. I didn't. I was scared it wouldn't work, so anxiety took over and stopped me. I went home that night and cried in my mom's arms. I told her that I was scared and that I needed to be admitted. She was very hesitant to take me in. So I was in a mental hospital for about 2 weeks.I am now taking duloxetine and klonopin and trazodone.
I attempted to kill myself by overdosing on trazodone a few months afterwards. My girlfriend forced me to throw them up.
I still self harm. I don't think my meds are working anymore. So anyways. That's my story. Thanks for reading.
12 yrs - 17 yrs: sx- Depression, GAD
17 yrs - 19 yrs: Depression, Anxiety, sx-BPD
19 yrs - now: Depression, Panic Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder
Also, on and off anorexia that hasn't be professionally diagnosed.... idk, I go through periods of not eating at all to completely binging myself out on food.