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On 9/16/2019 at 11:33 AM, Hopelessly Broken said:

I should wear a shirt to appointments with professionals that says "I'm sorry that you find it impossible to believe the seriousness of my words, but my blank face is not a ticket to emotionally manipulate me, jackass". 

 

This is a really good idea. I've been hovering, trying to be social, and my mind is blank.  The kids went to their dad's this weekend, so I tried to catch up on some rest, as I'm just so tired of this life. My dog went mental with a storm, so I gave her 150mg of trazodone (prescribed by Vet). It didn't really work, she just sat there looking like she was having a bad trip, ears back, staring at me. I was patting her gently, saying 'its all going to be fine, it's ok, please don't freak out and bite my face off'.  Also I forced myself outside  (to the porch). I stayed there for about 10mins.

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Sometimes I think that the single greatest factor limiting how long I can stay somewhere is how long it takes me to get intolerably cold.

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Got my official, formal, on paper diagnosis on 11/21/2019. Autism Spectrum Disorder Level 1. Was informally, verbally diagnosed until then. Feels pretty normal, nothing has changed, except I no longer question if I’m absolutely correct and not lying when I say I’m autistic now 😊 

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On 12/1/2019 at 10:52 AM, FairyBelle said:

Got my official, formal, on paper diagnosis on 11/21/2019. Autism Spectrum Disorder Level 1. Was informally, verbally diagnosed until then. Feels pretty normal, nothing has changed, except I no longer question if I’m absolutely correct and not lying when I say I’m autistic now 😊 

Mazel tov! Welcome aboard.

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Anyone else finding the change of routines, and changes to really, oh, *everything* in the world right now is triggering their autism? 

I feel far more stressed than usual. More sensory and emotional overload, more meltdowns. 🤦‍♀️

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Glad to see the return of this thread.

My husband and I went into self-isolation before the shelter at home order was issued by our governor, so I’m in week five. The first two weeks were really hard. My routine was destroyed, my social contacts, already limited, were gone, and I was looking at an indefinite period I was afraid I’d have to fill with nothing but dusting and dog-walking.

Then it turned out that the autism non-profit whose board of directors I’m on is frantically busy trying to figure out how to provide services via, well, Zoom, mostly, so since I’ve been a fascilitator for support groups before I got involved with that, and this place is keeping me sane both by needing my practical attention and by caring about all of you.

So I’ve been able to establish some new routines, though it did take time.

But you’re right. My senses are turned up even higher than usual, and every few days I lose it, and I have to spend [amount of time] alone in a dark room with earplugs in playing games on the NYT website. 

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Glad to see you're somewhat adjusting and coping, Gear :)

I really wish we had autism peer support groups where I live. Anything to do with autism and adults is so limited in my province in Ontario, and most services require you to be 'lower functioning.' Forgive me, I don't like functioning labels, but I can't think of a better way to phrase it at this moment. 

I find myself getting some of my support through FB groups for adults and women on spectrum, and the Twitter Actually Autistic community. I have some friends who are on spectrum as well, but a lot of the time I feel isolated. Getting my official diagnosis allowed me to breathe a big, deep breath, and go, 'Ahhh! Okay, good! I'm not a broken neurotypical, I'm a perfectly fine autistic. I just think and feel differently than some others.'

A lot of people have accused me of not being empathetic enough, I've also learned through my diagnosis journey that this is not the case. I do lack some cognitive empathy, because I can't imagine what it's like to be anyone other than me, but I've also realized that some people think I'm unempathetic and not supportive because I don't provide emotional support in the ways they find most beneficial. I tend to be logical and to try and help to find practical solutions, sometimes mixed with validation, sometimes not, depending on the situation. Now I've learned to accept myself as I am, and to realize that people need to speak up if they need something from me or I am doing something ineffectively. We are all adults. Using our words and communicating is paramount. 

I went off on a tangent.. Bringing this back in, I really wish we had an autism support group around here. I'd love to help others and give back, as well as get support myself ❤️ 
Let me also just say, pets are so therapeutic to me. I saw you mention dogs. I love my two cats beyond words, and they really help me to feel less alone too. They help me get out of bed every morning by meowing for food ;) 

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Start training for my new job role tomorrow. I will be a technical support agent now. After nearly 3 weeks of training without access to the computer system for the sales position that they moved us all to when the insurance company we worked for left, and me hunting down and nagging at many members of upper management and HR, they finally gave me a program transfer. Only because I played the autism card 🙄 They made it very clear a program transfer would not have happened if it were not related to my disability. I had stated I would not be able to adequately perform the sales role due to my autism. They wanted 8 pitches and rebuttals daily, or we were at risk of losing our jobs. Oh. hell. to. the. no. 

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We’re going to start a storytime via Zoom for the autistic children in our organization, so I’m looking at appropriate books, and I need to practice holding the books so they can see the pictures and I can see to read. It’ll give the kids something to do, and provide respite for their beleaguered parents.

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Quit my call centre job. After nearly a year. This new project I was moved to after 'Rona took my original one, was just way too much for me. I start a new position on Monday. Cheers to the transition and change anxiety 😅

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