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I havent cut or burned for a really long time which is really awesome considering I still have my sharp objects of choice. The way I have controlled the urges is through just saying I will cut myself later and then delaying it until I don't actually have the urge as strong anymore. The one thing I have trouble with is when I get really frustrated I sometimes hit myself in the head really hard repeatedly until I feel dizzy. It's been a week or so since I last did this and I'm really ashamed of it, I never had this problem until this year. I notice all my anger, anxiety, and depression all gets to a boiling point. I was able to resist hitting myself today but it felt really uncomfortable like I was pushing down all my emotions. 

Does anyone relate to feeling like their emotions just build up to a breaking point? Does anyone know if it is okay to be pushing the emotions down instead of self harming? I'm sure this is way less harmful but I am scared I won't be able to keep this up for longer. I've never gone long without some form of self harm! I hope I worded this right.

Edited by WinslowBoba
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Hey, I totally relate. I used to cut frequently in my late teens / early twenties. It lessened in my late twenties, now I'm in my early thirties with a daughter and because of her I don't cut anymore. I've cut once since she's been alive and she noticed it and though she didn't understand what it was, she showed great concern at me having "red on my arms". I still get the urge to hurt myself when my emotions are intense, mainly anger. I turn my anger in on myself, which was my main reason for cutting. I've read that for a lot of people self harm is like a release. For me it was always because I felt angry at myself and thought I deserved punishment. 

Have you ever tried breaking something when you're overwhelmed by intense emotions? Assuming you want to stop hurting yourself (some people don't). Maybe you could find relief in (safely) smashing/throwing things. Someone one suggested I try ripping paper (but like violently, lol). It was never the same. Ultimately I needed something outside of myself to want to stop cutting for. It was also awful to see how much it upset my husband too. 

And are you able to access therapy? A professional should hopefully be able to help you learn emotional coping techniques and such. :)

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I think self-harm usually serves a purpose and when you are quitting that gap needs to be filled with something else. Can you think of things to try instead for when you are dealing with anger, anxiety, etc? You can try out a bunch of things and see what clicks for you

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