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Targeted ads on CB

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26 minutes ago, Cerberus said:

This thread is being targeted by inline meta-ads:

"Answer a few short questions to get the best product recommendation for you."

Of course, we're also getting:

"Give the gift of UGG"

so I wouldn't put too much faith in product recommendations...

Uggs are really being pushed here. I havent been looking at shoes but here we are. I use the brave browser. Nukes tracking requests but i keep the ad blocker off for this site.

maybe the demographics for uggs are sorority girls, hipsters and crazy people. Some sort of weird trifecta. Unfortunately, or fortunately i only match the last one

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1 hour ago, echolocation said:

i just got an ad for floor mat rentals? who rents a floor mat?

I am laughing so hard at this 😆😆

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Ads for a pro-gun politician and an abortion clinic. 

Voting pro-gun is about the last demographic I’d fall into, and I had my tubes tied eleven years ago. Who the fuck do these people think I am?

I’m not buying a Dodge F-1500 either.

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Another one for an aged care facility. They know I'm on lamotrigine and am slowly going senile. 

Also this... I don't know why this guy has a crane in his head? 

 

IMG_20191121_222657.jpg

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Did anyone mention this one yet? Maybe I would like to experience it.

Screen Shot 2019-11-21 at 3.51.35 PM.png

Edited by Unstrung Harp

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@Unstrung Harp whatever it is, the guy in the ad looks pretty frightened. why is he on the phone? is that important? is this product.... like, literally just a pouch for your balls? so you can wear really short shorts and not have to live in fear of sideball? is that what's going on here? i have questions.

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23 minutes ago, Gearhead said:

@Unstrung Harp, I can’t even figure out what that is. 

 

14 minutes ago, echolocation said:

@Unstrung Harp whatever it is, the guy in the ad looks pretty frightened. why is he on the phone? is that important? is this product.... like, literally just a pouch for your balls? so you can wear really short shorts and not have to live in fear of sideball? is that what's going on here? i have questions.

Do you...do you pee in it so you don’t miss any of the game? Or is it protective gear for the batting cages or aggressive games? Maybe both? Like an absorbent, cushiony gel?

And what it that orange part about? Is it function or fashion?

Edited by Unstrung Harp

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19 minutes ago, argh said:

I need to buy that underwear that the guy is afraid of. I don't like being scared

Face your fears, argh. Buy the scary underwear. But keep your phone handy just in case.

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@Unstrung Harp I’ve gotten that one before... I thought it was supposed to be underwear for guys with big balls or something. Extra support. 

 

I’m getting Trump ads again.

Edit, just got this. 

image.thumb.png.a5df71b0d55745c0f2731dcb3626042f.png

 

Edited by saintalto
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54 minutes ago, saintalto said:

@Unstrung Harp I’ve gotten that one before... I thought it was supposed to be underwear for guys with big balls or something. Extra support. 

 

I’m getting Trump ads again.

Edit, just got this. 

image.thumb.png.a5df71b0d55745c0f2731dcb3626042f.png

 

Fear seems to be the theme. When I click on it nothing happens.

I went and googled it..3d underwear..which I guess is better than the 2d shit I'm wearing.

Extra comfort.

So i guess my junk will be comfortable when I'm scared. Or the channels in it will act as a shit trough

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More opioid addiction treatment, ethically sourced diamonds, and a non-profit working to end gun violence.

I’m going to meet the love of my life in rehab. We’ll get engaged, and I’ll dedicate the rest of my time on this earth to working on social justice issues.

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I'm really confused by the BallPark Pouch. I don't understand at all how the pictures relate to the product, lol.

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i guess serve discomfort in everyday tasks?

Or the dude is wearing a g-string that is made out of burlap, backwards.

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4 hours ago, Melancholya said:

I'm really confused by the BallPark Pouch. I don't understand at all how the pictures relate to the product, lol.

As I have repeatedly told my children when they harangued me with questions, The Internet Is Your Friend.

A quick search produced this on the subject of the BallPark Pouch:

Thanks to its 3D construction, the BallPark Pouch™ is perfectly formed to fit your anatomy. You can think of it like a super-soft lockbox – it’ll keep your boys cozy and secure. 

Besides an obvious feel-good factor, the BallPark Pouch™ offers a number of unique benefits. For starters, everything stays put, and you won’t have to worry about physically positioning your boys into the pouch. Next up, the pouch's mesh panels create a permanent divide between your balls and your thighs. This means no more sticking, downright discomfort, or impromptu games of pocket pool. Lastly, the BallPark Pouch™ provides natural support and movement, meaning that no matter the maneuver, your boys will be good to go.

So in essence it’s an athletic supporter with built-in chambers to sequester one’s man-parts. As a possessor of man-parts, I cannot imagine those being comfortable whilst in motion, and they are clearly not paying attention to the current trend toward “going commando”. And still this firm calling itself “Saxx” without acknowledging a shred of irony wishes to be taken seriously. I don’t think those are expressions of fear - they’re the models’ candid expressions of “You’re joking, right?”

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9 hours ago, Unstrung Harp said:

Did anyone mention this one yet? Maybe I would like to experience it.

Screen Shot 2019-11-21 at 3.51.35 PM.png

As the eminently wise Cerb says, the internet is your friend...

I hit Google images, looking for a better angle.

E0C1B0CA-2D5C-4D5E-84FB-0FFFA99F1EAA.jpeg

I was half convinced this was some kind of diaper. But then I looked at the Amazon reviews. And I had an epiphany. It was because of this review.

Super uncomfortable. The whole concept of having a bag like compartment for your sacks sucks in my mind but my wife got them for me as a gift. They do hold your junk front and center so if you’re going somewhere only wearing skivvies they’ll make your Derringer look more like a Desert Eagle .50 cal. As for me I’ll never put them on again.

I looked for more pictures.

69B868BF-1311-4C81-8928-F811A3FDFE64.jpeg

 

That one cleared up a lot for me. Even as a heterosexual woman, maybe clearer than I needed.

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