Banana Smurf Posted February 26, 2020 Share Posted February 26, 2020 I work at home in a newly expanded company. In the team chat today, my boss said that some of us may not understand the expectations yet and held up a piece of my work as an example of what to do and the reviewer said "good job banana"... I immediately panicked and shut everything down and then turned it on and did my daily paperwork and then shut it down and had fermented juice. I didn't know I could have social anxiety like that online. I am not sure why even praise horrifies me so much if it makes me noticeable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fluent In Silence Posted March 14, 2020 Share Posted March 14, 2020 Praise can be difficult. Anxiety can make you think that you aren't good enough and that you're going to fail. Then someone praises you and says "Good job banana!" This should make things better you'd think. In a Hollywood movie the main character would be shy and awkward but secretly loves to dance. Then she goes to a holiday camp with her parents and meets Patrick Swazye and has the time of her life and lives happily ever after, presumably. Not that I'm thinking of you as the girl in Dirty Dancing or anything like that. Where was I? Praise can cause a mismatch between how you think of yourself and how other people view you. And the expectations from someone holding up your work as a good example can make you feel anxious. It seems paradoxical that praise will make you feel worse, but if you don't think you deserve it then you won't really accept it, and there's the pressure of living up to people's good expectations when you don't think you can always deliver. Don't mean to sound negative. I know how these crappy thoughts work and it makes some sense that praise horrifies you. Ignore that shit. Yeah it's not that easy, but you apparently did well so give yourself a pat on the back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melancholya Posted March 16, 2020 Share Posted March 16, 2020 Praise makes me feel negative sometimes too. It's taken me years of work to smile and say "thank you" and try to really take in what someone is saying about me, accepting it as their truth, even if I don't think the same. I think some people experience Impostor Syndrome quite badly. Praise can make you anxious because you're thinking "oh no, they've got it wrong about me, what if they find out I'm not as good as they think I am?". This is anxiety-inducing for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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