I need some energy, some motivation, some good manic voodoo. Why cant i have that without losing my damn fool mind.?
Hasnt anyone looked at that? Why must I be either lazy and lethargic or 90mph? Im always tired, always fatigued. I need to know how to get my mojo going WITHOUT my kookoo taging along every time. I cant believe nobody has studied this.
This is a long shot, but I figure I can't be the only one who has ever had this thought. Is there a way to induce a state that includes the productivity/happiness of mania - without all the extra bullshit? 😅
Mania is better than any drug, the euphoria is incomparable. Every time I skip a few days of sleep, feel an increase in energy, or anything that might be the beginning of an episode, I think - ''Please let this be the onset of the best feeling in the world. I can't do this shit anymore''. I feel so guilty admitting to that, because I know that being manic and being functional are generally not compatible. I also don't ever want to end up in hospital again, because that never fails to be a de-humanizing experience.
I have not had any symptoms of mania since my last hospital admission, three whole years ago. It was the first and only manic episode that I've ever had, and it lasted for about three months. I feel like I could have avoided hospital completely if I had experienced mania without the accompanying psychosis. If I could just achieve that level of elation without:
rapid speech word-salad delusional beliefs dangerously impulsive acts (e.g. jumping out of a car on the highway because the sky looked beautiful and I wanted a loser look) I look back on those ugly symptoms and I could never cope with them now. I go to college full-time, I work, and I have so much to lose if I lost the ability to communicate with others and behave safely. On the other hand - my life just feels so damn gray and stagnant; I miss feeling invincible.
I'm trying to figure out how to address my nervous tics lately. They've been persistent this past year and are always changing. From eye blinking, to head shaking, to sticking my elbow in my sides, squeaking, to a eye closed swallow things. I can't remember them all.
I don't always have them. If I've properly slept and aren't stressed/anxious they don't exist at all. As I'm typing this I keep needing to pick up my thumbs and bend them till I hear something crack.
I don't know where to put this though!
This has become the central topic of my latest ruminations...I'm still in my 40's, but I'm worrying a lot about getting older. I'm having some random health issues (aches/pains, chronic fatigue etc) that I never had before.
I don't have any children and get triggered every time I see photos of other people's kids (literally everyone I know my age has kids now). I know that it's not a given that all families are happy or one's kids will take care of you in old age, but it's just the thought of having a family around! My parents are approaching late 70's and they live very far away, cannot travel. I have no other close family (or even close friends) that I can really depend on.
Anyone know how to remedy these anxious thoughts? One of my biggest fears is being alone in old age, with increased health issues, and being totally isolated/alone in despair. I'd rather die young.
For the last 20 years i am taking, 800mg Lithium, 200mg Quitipine, 150mg Serlift, 150mg of Bioprion, 0.75 of Alprozolam. I am now 54 years. Life is going on by God Grace.
Physiological Problems Either
Mental Illness 2. Behaviour
In Behaviour special children in public places Masterbating, or touching the Genetical Parts or Touching Chin.......
For me, from the age of 28 years to till now, I did not go to the above extreme, but
Whenever I go outside I used to see Ladies private parts, then my mind change to normal. I was working many firms for the lost 30 years.
Now I am facing shame is , my daughter 22 years. When we go outside me, wife and daughter, I did the same thing and my daughter noticed also. Still many responsibility for me, like my daughter marriage, then there is a functions etc.
So I want your advise. I need to have Therapy or Physiatrist Doctor. Can you pls advise.
I have been on Sertaline 100mg for the last 20 years and for the last 5 years Buprion 150mg XL (to reduce the smoking, i reduced to 4 per day). As i said above an example, i find very hypersexuality and i find one article today. Here i enclosed here.
My question: how to replace Sertaline 100mg and will stop Buproin 150mg completely. Can anyone give suggestion Pls.